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Women Should Always Carry Condoms. Always.

August 27th, 2009 Leave a comment Go to comments

Women who don’t carry condoms get on my nerves and confuse me.

Let’s start with the woman’s point of view, which is they have no problems keeping a stash of rubbers at their place of residence, but if they go out, men should be strapped. This only makes sense if I know for a fact I’m going home with someone or to someone’s home at the end of the night. But if my night is filled with a bunch of ifs, ands, or maybes, I know from experience, carrying a condom on me is the anti-rabbit’s foot.

Women always seem more comfortable with me when I don’t have condoms than when I do. It’s as though I didn’t plan to have sex, which endears me to them, but  is also dead wrong. I don’t know when it’s in my plans not to have sex. I just figure when a woman’s ready to do it, she will be prepared. And if she doesn’t have condoms, it was in her plans not to have sex.

The only exception in which it is a man’s responsibility to have condoms is if the action is going down at his place, because all men should have a stash at home. But if he doesn’t know how his night’s going to end or it’s not going end on home turf, women should be prepared.

Unfortunately, women like to play coy even with themselves; acting like there’s no need for them to have a couple of condoms in their purse because nothing is going to happen, or, because it’s unbecoming of a lady to be so ready. The truth is, neither of those dogs hunt.

Women, like men, cannot predict the future, but they should always be prepared for it. We are living in a time when one-night-stands are considered a rights of passage into adulthood, and no woman should be unprepared for hers.

As for those who believe only loose women carry condoms in their purse with no intent on using them, what a mistake. Women who carry condoms just in case are not loose. They’re smart, or, maybe they’re smart, loose women.

Either way, you get my point: Women, whether loose or uptight, should always carry condoms, if they’re smart.

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  • Linda Hobbs

    “We are living in a time when one-night-stands are considered a rights of passage into adulthood, and no woman should be unprepared for hers.”

    Sad. I wish we lived in a society where it was cool for women to see the value of honoring God by saving themselves for marriage as a rites of passage…

  • BMI

    my dude, this is ridiculous. if you hook up with a chick that night, just stop somewhere and buy condoms. there are delis on every corner of this city (i realize this doesn’t apply as much to outta towners, but outta town you’re gonna end up at someone’s crib, and everyone’s got condoms at home — and if you don’t, you can always hit a gas station). speaking of which, you mention that women have condoms at home, but not necc on them. are you smashing in the bathroom? an alley? if that’s the case, you shouldn’t have a condom involved anyway cause that’ll ruin whatever you both think you’re going for… seriously, tho, just stop and buy a pack of hats. if it’s too awkward for both of you, you should prolly rethink the whole having sex together thing in the first place. that said, i know this dude who always keeps a multi-size pack of tampons at his crib. now that’s being prepared. already.

  • dbaham

    Hey Jozen! It’s my first comment on your blog – are you ready? cuz it’s going to be long…

    Now, there’s a couple things I will say to this post. First, I think everyone should carry at least A condom on them at all times, because we live in a day and age where STI’s are real – and I for one am not trying to catch any or one of those things called a baby. (this could be the STI counselor in me, though – but I just dont think it’s really an option, unless you’re a virgin and don’t plan on having sex in the first place – then this doesn’t really concern you anyway)

    Second: I’ve heard that there are women who think that because a man had a condom on him that meant “he just knew he was going to get some!” No ma’am… that means that he values his life and yours, there’s a bit of a difference.

    Third: (and then I’ll stop waxing poetic in your blog comments lol) I also know men who refuse to use a condom provided by the woman, I suppose for fear that she’s done something to it or whatever – so even if she is smart and “has her own,” it won’t mean much if you dont have yours (if you’re that kind of guy), so maybe thats another reason why some women don’t carry one on them.

    and to BMI – “are you smashing in the bathroom? an alley? if that’s the case, you shouldn’t have a condom involved anyway cause that’ll ruin whatever you both think you’re going for” = HILARITY!

  • Tia

    Linda I do agree with you. Yes, we all should save ourselves for marriage. However, realistically speaking some individuals are just to hot in the pants to ever understand that!
    I think it’s the obligation of both parties to have their own protection. Personally speaking I rather supply my partner with condoms then for him to bring his own.
    Diseases are a major issue in today society. So I say the more protection you have at the end of any night they better your chances are with not contracting any STD’s.

  • http://blackgirladventures.blogspot.com Alisha

    I’m a first-timer here(in commenting!). I agree with you, Jozen. Honestly though, a lot of women think it’s the guy’s responsibility to provide protection since “they’re the ones who want some.” That’s totally unfair because most of the time we want it, too. If we didn’t, we wouldn’t be discussing who needs to have protection, right?

    As for guys who think women who carry condoms are loose, I think they need to kick rocks. We get hot and heavy, you don’t have them and I don’t, what happens next? We got a problem, dude. Now THAT’S killing the mood. I keep them at my place just in case (shit happens). When I moved out of my apartment, I noticed the movers were looking at me crazy after they moved my bed. I went in the bedroom and there was an empty comdom box in the middle the floor. Hilarious!

    Long story, short: Everyone is responsible for his/her own life. ACT like it.

  • thedlife

    I agree that women should carry condoms at all times if for no other reason than to make sure they cover their ass. STIs are very real and I’m not putting my life in anyone else’s hands. However in my quest to be safe I have encountered the men dbaham spoke about who swear that any condom a woman hands them has to be defective. They think you’ve poked a hole in it, let it expire or laced it with some miracle drug that will suck the sperm through the condom and directly into your uterus. These men are usually immediately disqualified from even looking at the goodies on the grounds that they are just dumb and ignorant as hell.

  • Belle

    i did a survey of men on my blog about women who carry condoms. Something like 11/14 were hell no on the idea. Glad to see you are enlightened. I’m not saying carry a Costco size box, but 1 or 2 (you gotta have seconds) is just responsible.

    it’s always better to be safe than unwillingly pregnant, STD/HIV infested. (I read stats on STDs for a living. it’s SCARY out there. 1 in 2 black people have herpes, according to the CDC.)

  • http://www.rochellespencer.com Rochelle Spencer

    Great post–adults need to act like adults.

  • Malaca Jones

    Word!

  • Malaca Jones

    Tampons? Multipak? Now that’s funny!

  • Malaca Jones

    I understand things happen and to that end, would the guy be offended if the condum was too big? I don’t have a penis so I guess it would be safer for the person with the penis to carry the right size. I’m just say n.

  • Malaca Jones

    You are Hella funny!

  • http://kandeezie.com Kandeezie

    Ah, save one’s self for marriage. Especially women, right? Because men, they can stick it to anyone before marriage and still be honouring G/god, right? [Double standards rule the world. Yay!]

    People should be adult enough to plan for sex, but sadly they do not. They seem to like the thrill of spontaneity more. Fine. And, despite our best efforts, not everything can be planned for, so…

    Go to the store together and buy a fresh box. Fool the dude [and yourself] by pretending you’re going to buy a drink when you’re not. If each of you do that, then you’ll have two boxes and can use them both all night! Fun times!!

  • Linda Hobbs

    Double standards are created in the minds of those who choose to perpetuate / believe them. God, though, is not the author of confusion :) He’s pretty much clear— though I know that people will flip it, agree, disagree, make fun of, and ultimately do what they choose to do anyway. Which everyone has been given a right to do…

  • Ms. Nikki

    I was just thinking about this. I’m glad to see the different views on it. I say women should.

  • Supergirl*thatswho.

    Oh Jozie! (i’m sorry if u hate this nickname, i had to do it) This was a funny post! “carrying a condom on me is the anti-rabbit’s foot.” Hilarious! And I could see how girls would be more attracted to a guy who doesn’t have a condom on them. Obviously we don’t have any clue that you do or don’t, but perhaps you give off a certain vibe that u’re not really gunning for sex so we put down our guard a little.

    I honestly don’t carry condoms with me, bc I’m one of those girls who likes to fool herself into that I’m not getting any. Just like when u plan for it u don’t get it, but when u don’t, u do!. Ha! **BUT** I do have a stash at home! Bc, i’m not trying do the nasty in public streets. I’m too old for that and I have my own place. **AND** I am big on stopping to pick some up b4 I head to his place. Isn’t that what 7-11s are for?

    Big ups to Kandeezie and Jozen’s “one night stand right of passage.” There’s nothing wrong with one night stands, sometime US girls just want to get it in also. But there’s also nothing wrong with saving yourself for marriage. Just don’t judge others because for what they choose to do. I just judge those clowns who have no problem sticking their unprotected peen where ever they feel like! With all these STDs, esp AIDS, and baby daddy stupidness, U would be an idiot to not strap up!

  • http://www.blackiecollins.blogspot.com B.Collins

    BMI- tampons in dudes house is the best thing I’ve heard all week.

    Secondly, I guess I’m old fashioned, but condoms are a man’s responsibility. There for YOUR d*ck. That being said, I carry female condoms. Because they’re for me…

    I’m completely, 100% joking. I have condoms in my house, but rarely bring them out with me. It serves as a hurdle to jump and if i’m running free and clear and left to my own devices, I’ll have way more sex than I’m already having. There’s a fine line between happily satisfied and happily hoed. I’m staying on the happy side.

  • LadyA

    lmao @ the idea of “carry condoms or end up pregnant/std infested” (as Belle put it). How bout bring your own condoms, or don’t have sex if you didn’t. Is the only alternative to safe sex, unprotected sex? I don’t think so folks. You should never be that thirsty for vag or peen that you risk your life/future for an orgasm that your un-std-ified hands could have gotten you AIDS/baby-free.

  • http://newolddawn.blogspot.com Dawn

    I heard somebody say go to the gas station and buy. I think you’re forgetting that people often discover the condom shortage in the heat of the moment. It’s a real time waster/libido killer to have to run out in the middle of something to buy condoms and given the time of night and the fact that condoms are all you’re buying it screams to the cashier at the gas station and anyone else in line that you’re horny and about to have sex and your procrastinating behind is now trying to get some protection.

  • Tim

    too bad its not cool and people bone.

  • citygirl22

    Dawn :It’s a real time waster/libido killer to have to run out in the middle of something to buy condoms and given the time of night and the fact that condoms are all you’re buying it screams to the cashier at the gas station and anyone else in line that you’re horny and about to have sex…

    @ Dawn, REALLY? Actually, dying young from HIV/AIDS seems like more of a time waster to me. Herpes sores, crusty scabs and foul discharges would be the biggest libido killers. I should think that sexually active adults are responsible enough for their health, that buying condoms should not be such a bother.

    And, ummm… who in da hell cares what the cashier thinks? You’re about to get some. You should be focused on that, and getting it safely.

    @ Jozen, I’m a newbie here, but I think this entry is off the mark. Women should carry condoms because BOTH parties should be protecting themselves… NOT because men are absolved from the responsibility for fear of having their intentions misjudged. Certainly, a woman who is progressive and pro-active enough to keep condoms without feeling like a “ho” would not deride a man for doing the same. If she is so old-fashioned that she is unprepared and expects you to also be unprepared, then my guess is no one would be smashing anyway.

  • Lauren

    i get your point, i also think it’s both people’s responsibility to protect themselves
    but I as a woman don’t actually know how to buy the right size… or are we expected to have a broad variety in stock, like a drug store or smth?
    id really like to do smth about it but how should you know who you’re gonna end up with?

  • http://www.facebook.com/maya.joye Maya Joye

    considering that we live in a society that is formed by more than one culture/religion/belief system that probably will never happen. I’m sorry but your religous beliefs are not shared in other communities such as hollywood and BDSM

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