@ Aminalove and Iloveketa, I totally agree with you both that women want a man who’s passionate about them… but the thing is, Darius professed his urgency outside the club welllllll into their relationship. By the time he says his swoon worthy statement about his love for her being urgent, there are reasons for his urgency… I still contend that him showing up at her apartment without her ever giving him her address – no sir! That is all kinds of stalkery and wrong. And while you can get away with some things if the girl likes you back, there have been times that I have been genuinely interested in a guy, and he’s crossed the crazy line – and it’s all over.

Truth be told, there’s certainly a thin line between passionate and crazy (shouts to Martin L), BUT c’mon – some things are just obvious. I think everyone should take a step back before making their grand gestures – real life doesn’t always work out like the movies.

I will side with GVG on this-

We do like stalker ass niggas. BUT Only if we like them back. In love jones it was clear to see that she was feeling Darius (she indulged him at the bar and the record store, she took the time to walk up to him after the his performance and write on his hand, she even looked back at him after she shut him down <>) so his showing up at her house is not deemed stalkery, its deemed cute and romantic. We like when a dude go hard in the paint for us.

Now if WE DONT like the dude and its obvious because we are not recipricating any of his advances then thats when the po po get called so on and so on

A dude knows when a girl not giving him no play vs. playing hard to get. PerioD.

I have had guys yelling outside my damn window for me to open the door or texting/blowing my phone up and have loved every second of it. Not the spectacle perhaps, but just the great depths this person will go to (embarassing themselves, risking blatant rejection)to prove to me how much they wanna be down

I want the guy that I am with to be obsessed with me. I want his body to shake and his pants to quake when he think about me. Why in the world would I want to date somebody thats casual about my love. If you are casual about things, you will become a casualty

So the moral to my long ass comment is:

Go for what you know

What I always take away from this movie was the scene where Nia’s character askes him why is it always on his time, why is it so urgent and Larenz’s character saying “I love you girl, and thats urgent than a motherfucker” I swoon even now that I think about. If a dude is trying to hollar at me, he cant be on some smooth “Im too cool to let you know how i feel” shit. It needs to be urgent, he needs to go hard, i need to feel some PASSION otherwise, I just feel like hes just doing some shit just cause.

Every woman wants to believe something about her will inspire urgency in a man.

“To me the difference between being persistent and being taken for the run-around is easily distinguished by one thing: a smiling face.”

The only way one can be “taken for the run-around” is if one is being misled, and in a situation where someone clearly doesn’t want to be bothered and is giving you all the signs of same (such as the one you presented), then you aren’t being “taken” on anything. That’s on you, fam.

GVG :
I have always said it – woman love stalkers, because in their heads they associate the behavior as an outward representation of his love for her.

Um…how ’bout NO. Women do NOT love stalkers. Please delete that thought from your brain immediately. INSECURE PEOPLE –gender notwithstanding– require excess attention because they aren’t confident enough in themselves and substitute self-worth with attention from others. It is not exclusive to women. I have had dealings with many a needy-ass dude who couldn’t handle that I wasn’t up his butt all the time, but I know that is about insecurity, not about his penis.

And saying that “our actions” are disproving our words…really? You know us? That’s absurd.

But I do Luv me some Love Jones! I gotta admit its the shit and I dig it like a grave

2nd – seriously, I always thought that was way too bold of a move for Darius to make in the movie. Even if a girl does think you’re cute and sexyfine and all that… you show up at my place after meeting you twice, you’re getting the po po called on you ASAP. There is just no room for cute crazy folks in a girl’s life.

And to that extent – GVG, definitely have to disagree with you. Any sort of resemblance to stalkerish tendencies will get you put on “oooh girl, make sure you always have mase on you” watch, just in case that fool wants to pop up somewhere.

Either way – I think women (and men, honestly) are very clear in the signals they send when they’re interested in someone. It’s up to the other person to pay attention, if they’re interested back.