My title
Home > dating, guys, women > Happy New Day

Happy New Day

December 29th, 2009 Leave a comment Go to comments

It’s happening right now.

Somewhere, some girl who has been dealing with me and all my crazy ways is making a resolution to leave me behind in the ’09. She is erasing my phone number out of her Contacts, probably blocking me on Gchat, and maybe, just maybe, De-friending me on Facebook and un-following me on Twitter.

She has vowed to herself and maybe one or two of her friends that she will not pick up the phone when I call, will not pick up the phone to call me when she feels like having sex, when it comes to guys, she’s all Jay-Z with it – on to the next one.

And none of this bothers me, the whole getting rid of me thing is something I can get behind because we all do it, every year. I’m just wondering why we wait until January 1 to start.

This year especially, 2009, most of the people I talk to are salivating for a new year, a fresh start, and I completely understand.

I want a new year too, a new opportunity to make new mistakes with new people. I want to make some new money to get rid of old debts and maybe, just maybe live a new life in an old place (that means I want to live in D.C.). I want new girls, new lovers, new fighters, all new everything.

After all, isn’t that what we all want? We want every year to be better than it was the year before. We wanted it in ’09, we wanted it in ’08, we wanted it in ’07. New years always make us want to leave behind old problems and exchange them for new ones, but I wish people would stop forcing it.

True change takes time and if anyone wanted to change their lives around, they should have been on that in October or August or May. We’re days away from a new year and a new decade, and as someone who came of age in the aughts, I feel the pressure of 2010 because in 10 years, I could be writing a blog entitled Until I Get Re-Married. Then again, I could still be writing this blog, living the same title. Who knows?

The pressure of a new decade only comes along every ten years, and the pressure of a new year only comes along every 365 days, but the pressure of a new day comes along every 24 hours and every morning I wake up, it is right there staring me right in the eyes and asking, What are you going to do today?

Well last week, a girl I dated recently for a couple of months decided December 24 was a fitting day to tell me she never wants to talk to me again, or she doesn’t want to talk to me for a very long time. And I don’t bring this up to brag or to boast or to seek pity. I bring this up because it illustrates the point I am trying to make.

We don’t have to wait for new years to change our life around, we could do it right now.

Happy New Day to everyone.

Categories: dating, guys, women Tags:
  • Noemi

    I think in respects to dating, it can be a gradual transition to end things. I personally try to end a relationship on good terms or salvage what’s left, but at the end of the day I realize when some men aren’t worth keeping around and seem more like extra baggage/harm then a blessing.

    It’s easier to itemize our priorties/goals/friends/acquaintances, etc in the new year, and let’s be honest, NYE resolutions gives us an excuse to get rid of someone on our checklist permanently.

    With that in mind it’s easier to fully satisfy our resolution because we have 365 days to stick to it, and never go back. If we were to attempt to change a situation at any other day of the calendar, the impact wouldn’t be as great, and some of us would revert.

    With the ball dropping and the tick of a clock, I can kiss someone goodbye and never look back. My resolve is that much stronger…

  • SassyNoLA

    12/24 girl and i are kindred spirits. i cut my guy off last night. feels so refreshing. not sure that MOST are cutting people off strictly for the new year. i think people get emotional around holidays and people act up around the holidays. holidays like xmas and nye show where people fall on your totem pole and i think that’s the reason for many cut-offs. if the same type of family/couple/totem pole holidays were in the middle of the year, i think we’d still see a high cut-off rate.

  • P.A

    I agree. Holidays make the little issues in our life seem like giant potholes in our road to happiness. Giant potholes require major construction; but if you have a Happy New Day mentality you never get to place where you are looking to overhaul your whole life. Thanks, Jozen, for giving me a mid day pickup. The Until I get Re-married line was classic!

  • *inquiring mind*

    Nice post, but I can’t relate… Do people really wait til NYE to break-up with someone? Who’s done it?

  • Reecie

    I agree wholeheartedly. Do it not now, but right now.

  • sugarae215

    I agree Jozen….regarding relationships, I cut people off whenever (I’m not putting up with your bullshit until 12/31 just for ritual’s sake). But it is that ritual of a “New Year’s resolution” and a “fresh start” that motivates people to make those changes in their lives. If more people would be more proactive about bettering their situation (cutting off that asshole back in April, devising and sticking to your workout plan in June, budgeting your money the majority of the year) we’d ALL be much better off….but that would make too much sense, right? LOL. Carpe diem people! 🙂

  • Sunni B

    I cut my guy off last night, too! I felt so rested this morning! Anyway…Valid point regarding people getting emotional and acting up around the holidays. I don’t celebrate the holidays, but the emotional build-up is infectious. Everyone wants to be around their loved ones during this time of the year which makes it quite easy to distinguish the keepers from the ones who just need to go.

  • Afroinstilettos

    100% agree! especially because i just chunked deuces to my “boyfriend” of 2 years. you’ve gotten on my f’en nerves for the last 6 months so why bring u & your insecurities into my new year. i did that shit 2009 & clearly it didnt work! anywho-good lookin on the post jozen! happy new year indeed!

  • Melissa

    Appropriate article! My date was 12/27/09. Dunzo! lol!

  • Deen

    Well damn! I need to go trolling for all these newly single ladies…

  • Teach It

    “Well last week, a girl I dated recently for a couple of months decided December 24 was a fitting day to tell me she never wants to talk to me again, or she doesn’t want to talk to me for a very long time.”

    (putting my violin away)

    Clarify something for me—You say you’ve been dating this girl for a couple of months, yet in your older entries you expressed concern for being dateless for an upcoming wedding. Is there a reason as to why you would want to take a different girl (different from the current interest)? Even if the wedding is out of town, why would you worry about not having a date when you are/were already dating another girl?

  • AM I the only one who has never heard of the term, “The Aughts”?!?!

    I had to that shit.

    1. Aughts 35 up, 8 down love it hate it

    buy aughts mugs, tshirts and magnets
    Nickname for the decade between 2000 and 2010.
    The Nineties were lame; I hope the Aughts are more interesting.

  • Jinx Moneypenny

    Exactly. That’s what I’ve been saying for the past few weeks. I said after what has happened to me since September I will be taking the gloves off and going in on people. And I wasn’t lying. I’ve been employing that wonderful resolution and I love it.

  • sony

    How did you eff up for the girl you were dating to cut you off completely? If you didn’t care about it you wouldn’t be blogging about it. Good luck adding notches to the belt in 2010.

  • PYT_JD

    December 20th the cut off happened. F waiting for the new year. I’d have to agree with what other folks have said..the holidays and to a lesser extent events like birthdays, weddings you where you are on totem pole. You went to that wedding by yourself but we been dating for 6 months..I’m special ordering christmas gifts and preparing a conveniently tell me dec 24th that your out to vegas with your boys in an hour. It all becomes very clear.

  • Pingback: A Style Muse » Blog Archive » He put a ring on it…()

  • Annaleisha

    Yup! I agree.