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Poppin’ The Questions 3

Thanks for all the questions, folks! Keep them coming, as I’m going to continue to do this every Monday or Friday until the The Million Dollar Matchmaker event goes down on June 3 (buy your tickets through here and enter the code “bachelor” for your discount).

Remember what this is about. Just giving you all a better idea of who I am, prompted by your questions. I appreciate all of you supporting me in the comments with last week’s installment. I’ll continue to do this twice a week, then once the event is done, probably go to once a week, every Friday. Tomorrow, I’ll give you all the regular posts for those who still aren’t feeling the “Questions” installments. Now, here we go, Poppin’ The Questions 3.

Favorite Disney character and why?

The Beast from Beauty and The Beast. I appreciated the way he checked Belle when she went to the side of the castle she was given instructions not to visit, but turned around and refurbished that library for her.

What happened with you and the social worker?

I’ve dated and mentioned more than one social worker, so you have to be more specific to get a more specific answer. But I do know one thing, seeing as I’m single right now, whatever happened to me and whatever social worker you’re referring to, I can safely say we’re no longer together.

Ever thought about getting a dog?

Yes, I actually want a dog pretty badly, but in New York, they’re a lot more work than they are in other places. But when I do get a dog, I already know its name: Mike Vick. Think I’m playing? Watch.

Thoughts on Obama now that the dust has settled and we got him in?

I’m really just happy he’s remained cool in the face of any and all adversity, I think years from now we’ll appreciate that about him. He’s not cool because he’s black, he’s cool because his demeanor is such.

Living in new york and all I was wondering…do you have a car or do you subway everything?

I’m the proud owner of a BMW, which is shorthand for Bus, Metro, Walk. I basically subway it everywhere, and cab it anywhere else. As much as I love driving and I do miss it from time to time, I’m a kid who grew up with dreams of living in New York and taking the subway everywhere, for me, was always a part of that dream.

Mountains or beach?

I like the beach because I grew up near them, but I’ll be honest, the ocean puts the fear of God in me. Where I grew up, we always heard of people drowning and getting caught in undertows, for those who have never been to a beach and seen the ocean themselves, take it in. When you think about it, it’s an unforgiving monster.

Name the last book you read.

I finished reading a few. Love Is A Mixtape by Rob Sheffielf; Cad by Rick Marin; No Belongs Here More Than You by Miranda July. Right now, I’m working on Manhood for Amateurs by Michael Chabon and Racing While Black Leonard T. Mill with Andrew Simon. Andrew was the guy who hired me for my internship at VIBE back in 2003.

I know you try to avoid drinking but when you do, what’s your drink of choice?

Stoli vodka martini with three olives or anything with vodka in it pretty much. I’ll also do Jack and Cokes. Beer is cool for me too. Oh, and shots of Patron are also welcome because I always know what kind of night those imply.

Describe your typical weekend.

If I’m doing it right, my typical weekend will include a good party, brunch, the Sunday New York Times, and of course, church.

What DID happen that led to the end of your last relationship? Curious to know what led to the conception of UIGM.

My breakup with my ex was a full year before UIGM was even started. I never even thought of starting a blog after we broke up. UIGM really started because I wanted to do a relationship blog with my own personal twist, and if there was one event in my life that led to its beginning, it would have to be me losing my job when VIBE shut down in June 2009. As to what led to the end of my last relationship, there are a variety of reasons it ended, and one reason it ended on the day it did. But all that will be revealed at a later point in time.

I’m 21, a virgin, and tired of being one. I want to lose it soon to a guy that I’m not serious with so that I can enjoy sex more intimately later with a guy that I love. Does this seem rational to you?

Yeah, but rational is relative, and in this case, if you’re talking about sex to a guy, most guys are going to find your reasoning rationale. I also want to say,being a virgin is a lot like being sexually active: If you’re going to do it, you better be comfortable with it. When you’re not comfortable with it, then stop living that way. I have no problem with virgins who are completely comfortable with it, but the ones who are not get on my nerves.

I know the whole thing is “until i get married” but are you really LOOKING for her? It’s hard to tell through your posts if you’re on a mission or just having fun or are you doing a combination of both?

I’m never looking for her because I honestly wouldn’t need to look that hard. There are plenty of women worth marrying walking around out here, I run into them everyday, but they’re not the women for me. I’m more like open to her. I’m right here. She can come whenever she’s ready, door’s unlocked, she just has to remember, I have to like her as much as she likes me. Until then, I’m having a good time and enjoying my life. This idea that I have to settle down before I settle down has never quite made sense to me.

Where are your favorite places to shop?

Anywhere there is a sale, but I do enjoy The GAP, Zara, H&M, and Uniqulo.

Are you trying to write for other magazines because every time, for example, I read Men’s Health, I’m like Jozen should be writing for them.

Thank you, I’ve always enjoyed Men’s Health though I’m not a loyal reader. But yes, right now, there are a couple of other magazines I’m trying to break into. If and when I do, I’m sure everyone will hear about it via this website.

When was the last time you cooked for a woman?

Within the last couple of weeks, but I’m not sure of the exact date.

What is your opinion on men who leave women because their “friends” were in their ear about breaking up with a girlfriend?

I understand them. In those situations, I always look at the women before I even speak on the man because I think most men don’t generally have opinions on the girls their friends date. They’re like, “Yeah, whatever dude. Enjoy that.” But if they start speaking out against her, and say they don’t like her, they probably have a good reason because if they didn’t, they’d just shrug shoulders.

What are your opinions on casual sex?

More women need to be down for it. That’s what I think.

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  • monique

    Favorite Disney character and why?

    The Beast from Beauty and The Beast. I appreciated the way he checked Belle when she went to the side of the castle she was given instructions not to visit, but turned around and refurbished that library for her.

    i think i just fell in love with you because of this answer. you have no idea how revealing it really is. this is like my own personal icebreaker and i would say 99.5% of the dudes i’ve tried this on have given me the lamest most unoriginal response ever. they’re reasons are something typical like “mickey because he was the main one” or “simba because lions are cool” …nothing i could really understand, respect, or learn something from.

    but your answer jozen….now there’s substance there.

    i like.

  • Netreia

    This Poppin the Questions Series is too funny to me. But, it is good to know folks really care about your opinion. Dang it, I wish I had an intriguing question to ask, maybe another day! ENJOY!

  • http://www.teaandsuch.blogspot.com Tea

    I don’t have anything profound to say, but I like this series, so I hope you keep doing it.

  • Sunkissed404

    “What are your opinions on casual sex?
    More women need to be down for it. That’s what I think.”

    Booooo… (Wrong answer). Sooo typical.lol

  • Miss. Riss

    Your thoughts on Virgins crack me up…lol

  • http://www.avenue8.com MissMina

    In response to this question:
    I’m 21, a virgin, and tired of being one. I want to lose it soon to a guy that I’m not serious with so that I can enjoy sex more intimately later with a guy that I love. Does this seem rational to you?

    You’ve made it this far, I would think that its for good reason. Most of us hand out our virginity like free popcorn because we’re too young to know better. Then you end up filling up your “list” with no-name dudes that you wish you could’ve passed on.

    From what I have been learning in my adult life, a fresh start is way more rewarding to that guy that you saved it for (aka your husband) than having an “experienced” woman. Because your mind will equate sexual pleasure with that one man. You will have never had something better that he can’t measure up to, and you can avoid the dreaded “Am I the best?” conversation over and over again. You won’t be tempted to jumpoff with the next man with a nice body or who looks like he has the moves. All you will know is him. So experience will come, and if he’s the one, he won’t mind waiting for you to catch up.

  • Jackie

    @MissMina

    Good advice! I think sexual experience doesnt really come from having more sex it comes from how much u enjoy it…BC if u really really enjoy sex then u’ll pretty much be down for anything and u’ll experiment so why not experment with someone special…You’re not going to learn anything just by losing ur viginity.

  • natural nubian

    “Anywhere there is a sale, but I do enjoy The GAP, Zara, H&M, and Uniqulo”

    let me guess, i can find you walking on Broadway in SoHo?? just please tell me you don’t do the nut-huggin’ skinny jeans!!

  • http://pastthevelvetrope.wordpress.com mimi

    lmao @ the beauty and the beast answer. aww.

    I love the shopping answer “anywhere that there’s a sale” hell yeah. i can’t say I’m always frugal. I’d be lying… BUT! Finding something cute on sale makes my day. lmao Well finding something cute period… okay… so nvm. :)

  • http://sweetilocks.blogspot.com Sweetilocks

    In response to the virgin’s question, personally that is completely rational. My first time was with a guy I had a little bitty crush on and later I came to love sex because I finally met a man I loved and we had it all the time!

    Which leads me to my other point, I would be more down for casual sex if I felt like the guys I met knew what they were doing. In my experience with casual sex, I’ve been thoroughly disappointed. It wasn’t until I was in a relationship that I was comfortable enough with trying new things and learning what makes him arrive and he learned the same of me. But if casual sex were as satisfying as relationship sex, I’d definitely be gung ho every time!