Some Rambling Words From Uncle Jozen
Well folks, it’s official, I am now an uncle to a beautiful niece. Her name is Armoni (pronounced like the fashion label), and she came into this world on June 11, at something like 7 pounds, 21 inches.
My sister’s in great shape post-delivery, the father has stayed at the hospital with her every night, and our family couldn’t be happier. I know I couldn’t be happier. With Armoni in my family, my whole life has now changed for the better and now it’s time for Uncle Jozen to do everything he can for his only niece, but just as important, for his only sister too.
I was never an over-protective big brother, and to my sister, I don’t think I was ever the kind of brother she wanted to be like as she got older. If anything, my sister, much like me, wanted to prove there wasn’t only one definition of success, there were many, and she was about to define it on her own terms. My sister didn’t graduate from college like me, she didn’t play in a jazz band like me, she didn’t leave Seaside like me.
But in every way my sister’s life is different than mine, it is every reason I am proud of her. I don’t think she will ever realize how much I learn from her from afar. While I was always about my career first, my sister has always been about family, and though I love this big city life I live, my sister’s small city life looks just as good.
While I moved across the United States to go to college just so I could say I made it out of my hometown. The furthest she moved from home was two hours north to Hayward, California to go to college just so she could be closer to our favorite uncle, Uncle Jeff. I have had more girlfriends than I can count. My sister has had like three boyfriends, and the one she’s with now, she’s been with for something like three or four years. I have close to 2,000 friends on Facebook. My sister has like 12.
The simplicity of my sister’s life is just as rich as the very complicated one I have created for myself, and every now and then, when things get hectic over here on my side of the map, I think about her and wonder why I can’t do what she has done.
My sister may be three year’s my junior, but when it comes to wisdom, she’s definitely my senior. She is more ready to be a mother than any person I know, and now, after all these years of me helping her grow up, my sister will teach me how to grow up. She is going to show me, through her own methodology, just how to be a person who puts family first, even if I’m thousands of miles away from them. For once, I’m ready to follow her lead instead of telling her to follow mine.
When I talked to my sister after she delivered the baby, I told her all I wanted to do was be a great uncle the way our uncles have been great to us and, because she was groggy and tired (I called her at 7 a.m. her time), she only said, “You will.” And like others told me when I wrote my post on Unclehood after I first found out my sister was pregnant, being a great uncle is something we grow into. But in order to grow into my role, I have to grow up a little, and though I have no idea what that means and how that will play out, I know what I want to do.
I know I want to be a man my family is proud of not because of what I accomplish outside of it, but what I do inside of it as well. I want to be a great uncle, and a better older brother. And if I don’t accomplish anything else in life, so be it, just let me accomplish those things, is the prayer I have been saying as of late.
This is me, honestly, rambling, and not having a clue as to what to do first. So I’ll end here, and go back to tossing around in my head what it means to be a great uncle. In the meantime, I know I have asked a lot of you all to do this before, but let me ask again: Share your best uncle stories in the comments for me please. The last time I made this request (here’s the link again, in case you missed it up top: “Unclehood“) , a lot of you did such a beautiful job I still go back and read them to this day, but I want to hear more, because I have no idea what I’m doing and I could use the guidance.
Thanks in advance,