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Five Reasons She Should Sleep With Her Best Friend

Here’s a question for all the ladies out there who have that one guy friend they think of like a brother…Well, wait, before I even ask the question, let’s dispel of the notion that the guy who is “like” your brother is a brother or related in any way by blood for that matter. He’s not. He’s a best friend. The guy who has been there when boyfriends weren’t….Now do all the ladies reading know who I’m talking about? Okay, good. Now here’s the question:

Why not sleep with him?

I understand “best friend sex” is one of those unwritten laws no one should violate, but we all know at some point, a man will be a man, and he will try his female best friend. And for all the men who have already done this, or have yet to do so but probably will anyway, their advances will probably be met with side eye city. So for them, I have taken it upon myself to be their representation.

Below, the five reasons why she might want to sleep with her best friend.


All he wants to do is give it his best shot. Why doesn’t the woman let her male best friend be great? If it turns he out he’s not so great, if it turns he’s actually bad, then the two people can back to being besties. And maybe, quite possibly, laugh about it later.


Let’s assume the two of them have been best friends since they were playing on swing sets and they know each others family. Now, let’s assume they decide to one day have sex and the girl’s best friend gets her pregnant by accident. Where is the man going? If the two of them really are best friends, they know each other’s family. The girl has the phone number of her new baby’s daddy mama. Hell they’re probably Buddy’s on AIM, follow each other on Twitter, and are Facebook friends. Where is he going? There’s nowhere to run or shirk his responsibilities. She can go on his Facebook wall all day and type in big, capital letters “WHY DON’T YOU FACE YOUR RESPONSIBILITIES LIKE A MAN!?!?!?!?” with her brand new profile picture of a baby that looks just like him. And besides, if he seems like the prime candidate to be a God father, he might make a good biological father.


I know this may sound confusing, to say one should have sex just because it’s better than bowling, but hear me out. The fact of the matter is, two best friends of the opposite sex always lean on each other to do fun things they can’t do with people of the opposite sex largely because the people they are each dating are a little bit pickier about the kinds of things they want to do. Most best friends do things the both of them like to do together. Fun things. As opposed to couples who do fun things together, but often times, one is having way more fun than the other (unless of course you’re dating your best friend, which would mean this whole conversation doesn’t apply to you). So considering two best friends always do the things they equally enjoy, things like bowling, they should just put sex in the same category of fun things they do with their best friend. I understand this theory needs some fine tuning, but it’s a start, right? Sex can be like bowling people, if it’s done with our best friends.


Most women fear a man is only into them for one thing. If he’s been a best friend to her, especially over a certain amount of years, isn’t it quite clear he isn’t into her for the sex? Don’t confuse a man’s patience or kindness for a lack of desire. Some men find themselves enjoying a big brother role, but trust me, if there are other positions in her life open, he’ll probably be more than willing to sign up for them. Like I always said, men settle into friendship, and some of us do quite well and prove we’re fully capable of being a good friend with no strings attached, so there should be no hesitation on the woman’s part because, this leads me into my last reason….


Let’s be real here. Most women have given it up for lesser guys and lesser reasons. So what’s the hold up?

What women need in a good male friend is emotional support, sometimes physical support (he’s always the first one to get a call whenever she’s moving stuff), and every now and then a shoulder to cry on. If a man has given a woman all those things, and in return has asked for nothing back, not even sex, I think a woman should take it upon herself and thank him the way all men like to be thanked — a lap dance with all the fixings.

I’m kidding. There doesn’t need to be a lap dance. The fixings should stay though.

I’m in no way saying, she owes the best male friend some sex. Not in the least. A man should be friends with a woman because she is a good friend to him. All I am saying is, if the man ever proposes some activity not called bowling, the woman should be open to it.

Categories: guys, s#x, Uncategorized, women Tags:
  • Julie

    I raise my hand and say YES! I’ve slept with my male best friend after a drunken night of clubbing. I had of course broken up with the boyfriend he couldn’t stand, so it was a good opportunity to do the one thing he had always wanted to do. According to him and I concur, it was great sex, and he wants to do it again, but I shut it down. Not that it wasn’t good sex, but had we been sober, I don’t think it would have happened.

  • M. Hendricks

    Ummmm….I’m going to say this: Sex changes everything! It can be for the good or the bad. Women especially should tread lightly

  • deeflyy

    hm…what about if she proposes it and he declines for not wanting to ruin the friendship? do the same rules apply? or is that whole reply just to save face? inquiring minds…

  • Andrea Schell

    Great blog! I don’t know if I agree with this post 100% but it’s an intriguing idea!

  • David

    Just my two cents here:

    If there is no sexual attraction, not even the slightest spark, between two heterosexual friends of different gender, I’d question the strength of that friendship. Either the give-take balance is severely tilted towards one party or the mutual respect is just not there. I mean, come on! You’re best friends with an attractive person with whom you share similar interests and can communicate well with. That’s THE formula for a successful sexual relationship. If that spark of sexual attraction isn’t there, then how can you be best friends?

    That doesn’t mean that sleeping with your best friend is a good idea and won’t ruin the friendship. Sex will definitely change something — whether it’s a major change depends on the friendship and, obviously, the sex. But the attraction has to be there, and if it’s not, you’re probably in denial.

  • PMoney

    oh my. it’s a joke peeps. no need to go ape sh*t on disagreeing. it was meant to be a funny post. whether u agree or not, just appreciate the humor.

  • Tea

    “IF IT’S BAD YOU TWO WILL STILL BE FRIENDS” Nothing could be further from the truth. The end.

  • aam

    I like and I agree! Speaking from a female who ONLY has make friends I would definitely say that going to that “unforsaken” place has only been a win, win for me. I have had three close male friends, two of which I still call my bestfriends to this day, cross over the friend zone and into my bed and it was magnificent. The only con and I mean only, is when you stop having sex and return to just friends, then the both of you move onto serious relationships, then he tells his new girlfriend the truth about you two and she can never look you in the eyes again because you have slept with her man. Anyone who knows about your sexcapades no longer see you as bestfriends and have a very difficult time trusting the two of you alone. So choose wisely or just keep it between the two of you!

  • Shelly

    5 Reasons you shouldnt:
    – She will become attached- you know we women get emotionally attached quickly!
    – Complicated
    – What if her best friend is friends with her “boo”- what if she ends up marrying her “boo”…only options are to keep a deep dirty secret or reveal this to her new hubby who will now hate the best friend (complicated)

  • Shelly

    whoops, I accidently sent the last post without the last 3 reasons, but I dont have 3 more …so you win….just go for it!

  • Schminky Dee

    If sex hasn’t happened already, it’s usually because the girl isn’t really attracted to the guy on some level, and that’s the main reason she still wouldn’t have sex with him

  • citygirl22

    “Most women have given it up for lesser guys and lesser reasons. So what’s the hold up?”


  • Ooooh No

    I agree with M. Hendricks. It does change everything, sometimes for the better! Now we are still friends but we can flirt with each other!!!!

  • Southern Poise

    lol cracking on. But you did make some valid points. Never really had a male best friend….. They all wanted to sleep with me…lol. Couldn’t do that lol.

  • Sm Ryan16

    omg this is so funny but so true i am a female who is secretly crazy over my best friend but feels it’ll mess up our friendship if we cross the friends boundary but this lol opened up my eye’s hell i deserve it too lol i’ve been their for him though alot of heartbreaks with his exs

  • Kaatch22

    I married my best friend and, oh boy, what a big mistake. After 8 months we’re headed for divorce court.

  • katy(:

    I did, it only brought us closer 🙂

  • Meg

    I have always had more male friends than female friends, and I am a very sexually liberal person. (Don’t worry, I’ve always been safe, promise.) I have had relations with several of my guy friends and it hasn’t made for anything more than something funny to joke about amongst the two of us. The idea that women can’t have sex without becoming emotionally attached is bogus.

  • Kay

    Yes i had sex 2 times in the same week with one of the closest guy friends and it made us closer. We were awkward at first almost to were we didnt speak a week or 2 but after that we have remained friends and gotten closer as friends. At least if something were to become of it, I know he would be in it for me since he has seen my best and worst!

  • Keisha

    I Had Sexwith my best friend, and things just got better between us..tghough there are some awkward moments first few days after the sex..

  • CJ

    I slept with my best friend..a few times actually and outside the bedroom it didn’t really change anything except the fact that we are now much more open with each other with things regarding dating/sex etc. I still can’t decide if it’s a good thing or not that nothing has changed.

  • goldnblack

    Nine years ago I had a best female friend and we were really close. She was actually my first. However the last night that we had sex there was something there she and I felt it. But I was afraid on taking a chance to we didn’t persue it. Over the years we have lost contact. However I never regretted about having sex with my best friend or regret he being my first.

  • Debbie Lusignan

    Most likely wasn’t truly your best friend.

  • Debbie Lusignan

    Happened upon this….becoming romantically involved with a best friend is NOT simple and it does change things. You risk losing the friendship if one person wants a relationship and the other doesn’t. It changes the friendship into boyfriend/girlfriend unless it truly is a very temporary thing. This can be great if you both want that type of relationship and find it with each other, I became involved with a close male friend and he is the love of my life. But, we had bumpy periods and during our breaks we near lost each other entirely. It is a risk and if you really don’t want something deeper, better not risk losing a great friendship over sex. Over love, yes. This guy just sounds like he wants to sleep with a female friend, period.

  • Bestfriendsforlife?

    I recently ended up sleeping with my best guy friend, one ridiculously drunken night where he made advances that were so strong a single-for-3-years me eventually gave into. I told him straight up that he needed to be sure he wanted this to happen because there is no going back, and he carried on and I gave in. I mean I have blood pumping through my veins, of course I miss having sex!!. So we did the deed 😉 and it truly wasn’t magical loving experience. I get very Cold and bossy when it comes to casual sexual escapades and it was no different with him. Afterwards I demanded to be taken home and I woke up the next day knowing I wasn’t in love with the man I’d just slept with.

    The problem is we met up 2 weeks later to speak and I get the impression he wants more from this, but I sadly don’t feel the same. Sleeping with him has made me loss a level of respect I had for him, and has me seeing him in a very unattractive light. Which is really sad, because things would be a lot simpler if I could fall in love with my best friend and live happily ever after. Where we go from here, I have no idea. But I’ve lost the want to spend time around him.