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Five Ways A Girl Can Make Her Guy Comfortable With Girls Night Out

Girls night out is every guy’s nightmare. Trust me when I tell you. No man likes it when his woman is getting all dressed up to go and hang out with her girlfriends surrounded by a bunch of other guys who are not us.

I know we may act like we want our girl to hang out with her girlfriends, but really, it makes us nervous. Especially for men like me who know if they haven’t already gotten what’s coming to them for our trifling past, it soon come. Yes, we will encourage a woman to go out and have a good time and try to act like we can use the space too, but honestly, we’d much rather her go take a walk to anywhere but a bar or a lounge.

So now that I have divulged this little secret, allow me to suggest a solution as to how to make girls night out a comfortable night for the man in her life. Actually, make that five suggestions.

DO IT DURING BIG GAMES

Especially during football season, depending on the team a man roots for, there are some great opportunities for a woman to make plans with her girls. Don’t get me wrong, I love a woman who can sit down and watch a game with me, but I’m never mad at the woman who says she’s going to do her own thing during the time the game is on. That shows she’s thinking. What shows she is not thinking? Going out with her girls on a night where nothing is on television for me to watch. I mean, come on, ladies! Everyone knows Friday night television hasn’t been good since they canceled Full House and Family Matters! Why don’t women think about these things? Now I’m over here pacing the floor, looking out the window every time I see some headlights flash all while watching ESPN News loop the same highlight reel over and over again.

AT DINNER, SHE NEEDS TO CALL AND ASK HIM IF HE WANTS HER TO BRING ANYTHING HOME

The other night I was at a restaurant, sitting not too far from a group of women who were clearly doing their own version of girl’s night out. One of them got on her cell phone, dialed her man’s number and said, “Hey sweetie, I’m here at this restaurant, do you want me to bring you anything home?” I wanted to kill the man on the other end of the phone and marry that woman myself.

Aside from the obvious common courtesy a woman demonstrates when she calls up her man and asks him if he wants her to bring anything home, this gesture is also somewhat of an insurance policy for men. It’s a way of saying, “No matter what happens tonight, I’m coming home to my man.” Besides, I also know no man wants to talk to the girl carrying the to-go container of food, especially if it’s one of those pungent dishes. So yes, I absolutely will take the chicken yellow curry. Thanks, babe.

DON’T TEXT, CALL

When I said I wanted her to check in, that did not mean a text that says, “I’m here.” WOMAN, WHERE?! That’s how I would respond. I want to hear where a woman is, not get a sense from the text. See, women don’t do this and that’s how they end up with tracking devices on their phone unknowingly (kidding). Besides, why wouldn’t a woman want to call her man to tell her where she’s at. How else is she going to know where I’m…wait…on second thought, don’t call, text.

SHE SHOULD ACT LIKE SHE DOESN’T WANT TO GO OUT, LIKE SHE DIDN’T HAVE FUN

Before she leaves the house, the only thing I want to hear my woman talking about is how much she is dreading the upcoming festivities. Say things like, “I can’t believe my girl has me hitting these streets with her. I told her all I wanted to do was spend the night inside with my man. And then I lost a bet. Can you believe that baby?” I will believe it, because I’m gullible like that and a woman needs to take advantage of that by lying to me and acting like she doesn’t want to be with her girls at some spot where some other guys are giving her all this attention.

When she comes back from going out, again, she need not act like she had a good time. It’s all good to come in and make all this noise as she changes out of her club clothes into her night clothes. I don’t mind waking up to that sound. But if she comes back in humming, “Let me hear you say ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah…” I’m going off, and it’s not for waking me up.

SHE NEEDS TO GIVE HER MAN SOME…RIGHT BEFORE SHE LEAVES

And when I say right before, I mean, grabbing the keys, three steps from walking out the door, right before. I want to do it  when her hair is done, the makeup is applied, and the heels are on. And we don’t even have to lay down. We can stay standing. But yes, we need to do this right now, and she needs to text her friends that she will be outside in three minutes. Three minutes later, I give her a kiss and simply say, “Have fun with your girls. Don’t forget to call. I mean, text.”

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  • Jinx Moneypenny

    That last one… works like a charm! Like I literally don’t have to worry about SQUAT after that, he’s calm, I’m cool, everything is all good.

    Great list.

  • http://sistaintokyo.blogs.com Sista in Tokyo

    Love your blog, have been a reader for some time now. I would add– be sure to cook up some nice game snacks before heading out!

  • leressa

    I might even be down for all of those things EXCEPT givin you some on the way out the door!! Once the hair is done, make up on, shower is taken… you can fogeddaboutit!!!! I will ofcourse be happy to break you off immediately upon my return because I wanna hear you say… ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah 🙂

  • stellar

    LOL! This post is soo funny! Well written Jozen!

  • Ivy St.

    This post made me laugh because this is my boyfriend to a Tee! I always suspected he had some underlying feelings about me going out with the girls from time to time, but this confirms it. Before any event where there will be males and he won’t be attending, he ALWAYS tries to get some before I get ready. lol!
    I’m attending a kappa soiree this weekend, which I’m excited about because it is a chance to get dressed up and bond with the ladies. I asked my bf months ago if he wanted to attend and he said no. NOW he has some interest in going, but it is too late. I refuse to pretend to not be excited about this event. I got a new dress and everything! lol!
    Great post!

  • Ivy St.

    To add to the post,
    Don’t wear an outfit he has never seen when going out with the girls.

  • http://www.wellbehaveddontmakehistory.blogspot.com Miss Malorie

    Now you know we can’t get into that once the hair is done… do you know how long it takes to get that perfect hairstyle? lol 😉 Thanks for this list! I’ll keep these things in mind! 🙂

  • Keia

    Hilarious!

  • MissAmbitiousGirl

    I have 2 friends getting married between now and November. I will make sure to foward this to them. I might even put it on a poster and give it to the as a wedding gift.

  • **inquiring mind**

    “Don’t forget to call. I mean, text.”- smh… this post was dope tho lol

    My addition:
    Dang I’m not so good at this… I guess I only know how to make ninjas jealous *shrug*. Oh wait, I guess if it’s not a game night you could already have dinner cooked for him, you know, so he feels like top priority… maybe. Then if you wanna, you can call and ask if he wants something like from the desert menu… I dunno, I told you I wasn’t good at this.

  • http://www.onlyoneheaven.com heaven

    I’m with Leressa…. ain’t no way in hell I’m going to get done up, just to get squirted on right before I leave the house. I’m not trying to go into the streets sticky… I was with you for all of the other things listed… but NOT that one…lol

  • Miss. Riss

    Yet another post for me to remember to check back on. 🙂

    that last one, i believe goes both ways. when I’m leaving and when he’s leaving (especially for long trips) you have to get it in. you just have to.

    i love when i read your posts and i realize i was doing all the right things, they’re the ones that f’d it up.

    good post!

  • Jackie

    Do does this list work vice versa? Do the fellas have to follow these rules too?

  • morningjoi

    This list reeks of insecurity. Except for the last one. I’m all about the quickie anytime either one of us is about to walk out the door.

  • Kar

    Absolutely FAB list….. I laughed, hmmmm’d, aaahh’d all the way through

  • ladymaxie

    whoa! i just had this little issue with my new guy…hes a spring fling made into a bf, in other words hes trying to make sure everybody knows i’m a taken girl. which is fine but the thing is hes does it in a passive aggressive way. when we firs started dating, we werent exclusive so i did what i wanted and so did he. now that its official, i’ve noticed that if i mention any girls night out events, he’ll make sure to drop by my apartment while im getting ready. he’ll actually drop hints like “babe why don’t you just wear those flats over there… suggest i wear something from my work closet.” i’m looking at him like no, when you first met me at the lounge i was wearing stuff from my hoochie closet. haha.

    ooohh and the part thats so obvious is when he’ll suggest places that he knows his cousin is doing security at…cause he just wants to make sure “my single friends dont get harrassed”- i just give him a kiss and hand him the remote. he can watch spike tv till i get back home. haha.

  • http://sleep-is-the-cousin-of-death.blogspot.com/ MadScientist7

    this reads like a man who lives with his woman. cohabitation before marriage (or at least engagement) is a fail. i agree with the last point though.

  • A

    loved this post!

    curious though, mad scientist, why does this read like a man who lives with his woman? and why is cohabitation a fail?

  • Tiffany (htownsrealest)

    WONDERFUL JOZEN!!!! I’ve been trying to come up with the perfect recipe to link up with my girls from HU and not make him feel uncomfortable…. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!!! I think we should link up Saturday during the Texans vs Cowboys game… hmmmmm

  • Spring

    @ morningjoy- Yes this post is talking about a man’s insecurity. All men and women have some level of insecurity (including you 🙂 ).

    @madscientist- I don’t agree toatally that this reads like a man who lives with his woman. A man and woman in a relationship tend to spend a lot of time with each other so coming home to bring him dinner and coming home to him after a girls night out is not unusual for a non-cohabitating couple.

    Great post Jozen!

  • Leah

    I think I love Madscientist. LOL!

    And loved the post, Jozen. I’m joining the camp of women who will not give it up right before walking out the door. Before I became celibate, I had a boyfriend who would try that. How annoying. Then you gotta get BACK in the shower. Ummm, nah sweetie. You better get it in before I take get dressed because after that, it’s a wrap.

  • BoomShots

    I am gonna assume this is all tongue in cheek or I must be in the minority of men who looks forward to “Girls Night Out”?

  • wahoo4uva

    Apparently men are a lot more like women than I’ve thought. You have the same insecurities, you’re just better at hiding the emotion. Very interesting!

    Highlight of the post: “Let me hear you say ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah…” I actually laughed out loud on that one. That’s my JAM!

  • Melissa S

    I love this post. Hilarious!

  • Leah

    @BoomShots
    I don’t think it’s tongue-in-cheek at all. I’m thinking you must be in the minority (or one of those who refuses to admit to your angst). :-p

  • Nephilim

    Even though I may be THAT INSECURE, I’d be damned if I’m gonna let her know by requesting these things. Naah hombre!! I’ll take the last one though. 🙂

  • Ansel

    Dude…This should be mandatory reading for all girlfriends and wives!

  • BoomShots

    @Leah

    Actually, I had to learn to feign those things in my relationships as I was advised that others expect it, it makes them feel wanted. When my woman is unavailable I am usaully busy doing my own thing, so I really don’t have time to dwell on what she might be doing.

    I understand where everyone else is coming from I just don’t let that creep into my thinking, if she is going to step out, my being extra vigilante may delay it but not stop the thought, so why work myself into a lather. I don’t make myself responsible for teh action of other adults.

    So its not that I never had insecurities about my relationships, I just never allowed them to dictate my behavior or infect my thoughts. I always have to remind myself to tell her i miss her, even if i don’t and express some sense of urgency because its expected.

  • T.J.

    I don’t mean to rain on your parade here but this sounds like the list of somebody who’s either very young or very insecure about his lady going out with the girls.

    Most guys I know in the upper 20’s/early 30’s would LOVE to see their girl go have a girl’s night out. “What’s that you say, dear? Going out with the girls? GREAT. See ya tomorrow! Have fun!” And it’s not b/c we don’t want to be around our lady (just to nip that argument in the bud) but it’s about having a healthy balance of couple time and personal time. Nobody wants to have somebody up under them 24/7.

    And what’s this talk about checking in???

    Are you kidding me?

    Checking in??? For what? If you’re out, I trust you to be out. No need to call in.

  • http://www.onlyoneheaven.com heaven

    @madscientist

    You said that “cohabitation before marriage (or at least engagement) is a fail.” not in all cases buddy… at least not in mine. My now husband used to be my baby daddy and we were just living together for almost two years before we got married… so its not ALWAYS a fail….

  • http://www.onlyoneheaven.com heaven

    I wanna say that I think that some of the things listed were kind of a joke…….?? ……lighten up folks……

  • afro

    LOVE the lists! great post!

  • http://adivastateofmind.com A Diva State Of Mind

    LOL very entertaining post. I wish someone would want to me to really check in. If I’m having a girls night, that means I’m out with the girls. I’ll talk to you when I get home.

  • http://www.falliblesage.com Fallible Sage

    Funny post, and I’m assuming tongue in cheek.

    When I was younger I was a lot more insecure, but even then I didn’t have a real issue with ladies night. Maybe I’ve been in relationships with trustworthy women for the most part. But if I gotta be that stressed cause you out with your girls then it’s probably not the relationship for me.

    Only issue I’ve ever had with girls night, is when it’s been girls night more than it’s our night. If I’m constantly competing with your girls for your time that’s a fail. That’s why I tend to shy away from dating women in their early to mid twenties… they often haven’t gotten a lot of that out of the system yet.

    Still I’m gonna advocate number two and five. Food and sex are never wrong.

  • jioy

    I’m a new Reader but this is great except for 5, I’m waiting til marriage but he can get a kiss!

  • Leah

    LOL @ food and sex are never wrong.

    @BoomShots I actually agree with you completely. Strangely, I’ve always thought a man better for faking concern about me when we’re apart; and I always played the role of pretending NOT to worry since I know most men would see that as insecurity, which isn’t a desirable trait.

    The truth as I see it is that women do tend to be concerned about “boys night out” and men (or at least the men I know) are much less concerned.

  • Vonny

    Thanks for the tips Mr. C! Got a few side eyes from the co-workers wondering what I was laughing about! Lol

  • Jen

    Thank you for these tips. I would have never known this….

  • Tasha

    Finally some conrete advice the ladies! Love it! Hilarious and cogent! How do you do it, Jozen?

  • juello

    Three minutes? 3 minutes. Not the best way to stay on her mind before sending her out with the girls.

  • kS

    pee-my-pants laugh-my-cheeks-off loved it 😀

  • Tonda Renee

    I’m laughing hysterically and ALMOST sent this to my S/O till I remembered ALL of these apply to him…ROFLMAO. Our 1st fight was over whether or not I should spend the night at my GAY BFF’s house after a girl’s night out…..I hate ALL of my male friends because they took HIS side….

  • L. Dejean

    good post, i’ll keep some of these things in mind!

  • Nadia

    I just started reading and this blog is always the 1st I read..I can always count on Josen to brighten my day lol

  • Ash

    LOL #1 is not going to happen, unless a. it’s baseball or b. me and my girls are going to said big game or c. me and my girls will be watching said game elsewhere.

  • http://nifermusings.blogspot.com Jen

    Wow… I’m glad I’m dating a man who has a life… and who knows to do his thing when I’m watching football! I think he would laugh at these rules and ask me if I expected him to follow them because he doesn’t expect them of me.

  • http://basikconcepts.wordpress.com/ trinity

    lol..i would give up the cookies…lol why not before going out…makes you think about round two later that night….

  • Kim

    You would much rather her take a walk somewhere?? LMAO! That is just what I needed to read! That is hilarious! Hoping you are not that needy though…haha right??

    Love it!

  • Charlene

    Hilarious! I laughed the whole time while reading the post! Good job!

  • Cali

    The only thing I truly agree w/ is arranging it when a big game is on, that’s considerate. But the other stuff?? LOL, if a woman asked her man to call her from the table & ask if she wanted anything, the man would NEVER (most men, anyway). Sweet to do every now & then, but a tall order to do on a regular. & he gets nothin’ once I’m dressed, come on! lol