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Why Women Should Not Be Allowed To Watch Football

September 13th, 2010 Leave a comment Go to comments

Okay, I don’t really mean what I say in the title. But when I called up my business partner Jermaine on Friday night to discuss the idea behind this post, I admittedly did say, “Women should not be allowed to watch football. It’s not fair.”

On Friday evening, all the women I follow on Twitter, tweeted on and on about New York’s Fashion Night Out. For the readers who aren’t up on game, Fashion Night Out is basically a holiday for most women in New York. It’s a whole evening of shopping, partying, and schmoozing side-by-side with famous people.

So I’m reading all these tweets my female friends I follow and I think it’s great. Women should be able to have a night like this because guys have  football on Sundays and the season just started. But then, I see a couple of tweets from  women about how great it was that two days after Fashion Night Out, NFL Sundays were returning. That’s when I said to myself, “Not fair.  Why do women get to have their night and get to enjoy my day too? Who let that happen? Where did us men go wrong?”

Now before we get up in arms, let me reiterate, I don’t really believe a woman should not be allowed to enjoy a football game and a runway show. It honestly didn’t really piss me off that a woman was having the time of her life at some Fashion Week event, and then was going to turn around and enjoy a full Sunday (and Monday) night of football. Still doesn’t.

But to see these things being said did beg the question: What activity or thing made for women to enjoy can a man enjoy equally, without the ridicule? If I wanted to go to Fashion Night out (because I like nice clothes and shopping), I would get laughed at not just by men but by women too. If not laughed at, given the side eye. Meanwhile, anytime a woman enjoys something more commonly associated for men to enjoy, she gets put on a pedestal.

Fashion Night Out, from what I read on Twitter and in the press, sounded pretty fun. More importantly, I am positive the streets of downtown New York City were teeming with pretty women. Of course, it wasn’t like I was banned from going down there myself, but I know if I was standing in Soho on the corner of Spring and Broadway with my boys, sipping on a red cup of something, and I tried to talk to some pretty young lady, she would probably write me off as some guy trying to be her BSB (best shopping buddy (and yes, I think I just made that acronym up)), when I know I’m really trying to be her JO.

Women, on the other hand, can round up all their girls on Sundays (or Saturdays if they’re the college football types), go to some sports bar, and enjoy the game just like a man and get applauded. Most other guys in the sports bar would probably offer drinks, take care of their meals, or engage them in a conversation, all because these women are into football, especially if they can talk about the importance of field position like a special teams coach. Sure the women may not have come for that kind of attention, but they know they’re going to get it, why else do they leave the home to do something they can do at home?

Like I will say for the third time, it is perfectly fine for women to enjoy the things men are more likely to enjoy, but when can men start enjoying some things women enjoy without being mocked by other women? As many women who may tolerate a man scheduling an appointment to get his manicure/pedicure, there are just as many who won’t look at him and think, “That’s just the kind of guy I like.”

And no I don’t get a mani/pedi, so let’s not get into semantics.

This is about all the men out there who enjoy baking and aren’t pastry chefs, who enjoy watching Sex and The City with a cold beer in their hands, who enjoy going to a spa and getting massaged in oils and stuff, who want to order a salad instead of a steak. When can men do these things without their woman looking at them quizzically?

The list can go on and on, but I think we get the point. When it comes to gender roles and leisurely activities, women can be a  lot more flexible than men. And when I think about why this is, maybe it’s because far too many men encourage women to be like one of the guys and women have let that go to their head. Maybe women have started to ridicule the man who watches Project Runway on his own time, because other men have allowed her to believe a real man doesn’t like a girl who watches BRAVO, a real man likes a girl who watches SPIKE.

Well personally, all this putting a woman on a pedestal because she likes to watch the game is over with.

As far as I’m concerned, it’s great if I meet a woman who enjoys watching football on Sundays, but it’s even better if I meet a woman who knows I enjoy watching football on Sundays and enjoys that time I spend doing so, doing her own thing.  So, no more extra cool points just because a woman likes to watch the same sport I like to watch (though if she is a Steelers fan like me she gets a million cool points). That’s really great and all, but I hope the woman who enjoys the game on Sunday enjoys going to Fashion Night Out as well, because if I’m still single by Spring Fashion Week, that’s where I’m going to be, looking for her.

P.S. To my brother’s girlfriend who is a die hard New York Giants fan and watches every game with the guys, none of this is meant towards you. Thank you for the delicious baked mac ‘n cheese and chicken, last night.

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  • Erica

    Love Love Love this!

  • Corea

    Lol You’re right, it’s not fair. But it’s oh so much fun! Next year, go get a manly and a pedi and then head down to your favorite stores to shop around 10 pm after a 1pm football game (since they close extremely late on Fashion week) and get some great items without worrying being judged. I know your not getting married anytime soon but I am pretty sure that you’ll find a YTR out there who isn’t intimidated by a man’s love for fashion. No more pouting hun. Make it different next year love!

  • A Diva State of Mind

    Clearly this post shouldn’t be directed toward any die hard female football fan. As a lover of fashion AND a die hard football fan, I find this post hilarious!

    Who says guys can’t enjoy FNO? I know a few guys that attended FNO in Georgetown and NYC. The point of the event is to encourage shopping and make it fun again so I don’t see why a guy would be ridiculed for wanting to participate. Maybe I’m different than most and don’t see a problem with guys shopping.

    And it is possible for women to go to a sports bar and NOT have her food and drinks paid for. Why should we have to watch the game at home?? Maybe we watch the games at bars like everyone else b/c we enjoy the atmosphere. Hmm that’s a thought..

    Female football fans didn’t ask to be put on a pedestal for loving the game. That’s something guys have done; you all made it a big deal if a woman liked sports and hung out with the guys. We just love the game like everyone else. Nothing more, nothing less.

  • **inquiring mind**

    “… when can men start enjoying some things women enjoy without being mocked by other women?”

    When y’all start having babies… get over it.

    Every week there’s another “no more” rule adding to a very TALL list… keep this up, soon your list is gonna have “no more women” #rimshot #shotsfired

  • Tiffany

    Ewwwwwww Steelers fan. I do everything in my power to avoid watching football. I know nothing about positions or not so famous players. I watch simply because that is what is on the tv and usually I peacefully bow out and hit the Redbox.

    Peace, Love and Chocolate

  • Mocha O

    Life isn’t fair…

  • Jade

    I think a lot of women are not football fans, they just engulf themselves in things that men like. Your post reminds me of the movie “Runaway Bride”, when Julila Roberts made it a point to submerge herself in everything her significant other liked. Down to food, she did’t even know what kind of eggs she liked because she liked whatever kind of eggs her man at that time liked.

    I will tell you, I don’t know a damn thing about football and I love clothes! I can tell you I have no idea what the hell pre-season games mean in the scheme of things, but i’ll talk to you all night about traveling and politics.

    I think this all comes down to confidence, a woman should be confident enough to be honest about what she doesn’t know, instead of looking at the games puzzled piggy backing off her man’s comments. She should also be secure enough in her relationship to acknowledge that her man likes a Pedicure and enjoys project runway. Listen, these things don’t make you gay, being gay makes you gay (not that there is anything wrong with that).

    I urge women to bake cookies on Sunday night, enjoy happy hour with the girls on Monday evening and Rock his world on Monday night. Not only will it not matter that a football game was just on, but the only score he’ll be keeping is yours in the bedroom! Touchdown for a girlie girl!

  • Danni


    “Ewwwwwwww Steelers fan”.

    LOL, that’s exactly what I said :).

    Anyway, in all honesty, I tried and tried to think of something that women really enjoy that men could participate in and not get ridiculed. Couldn’t think of a damn thing.

  • Leah

    I have nothing meaningful to contribute to this discussion. I just want to say I hate football, football season, NFL Sundays, Monday Night Football, Superbowl, Superbowl commercials, and all things football related.

    I agree though, that there really aren’t too many “women’s activities” that a man could participate in and not get teased for, even though I think that’s pretty stupid.

  • Yesi Jukebox

    Women wouldn’t mock men about “women” activities if men didn’t start the trend. I couldn’t even read this whole blog entry because I found it so ridiculous. I don’t understand why men can’t enjoy Fashions Night Out. I know plenty of guys who like fashion and likely enjoyed themselves that night and I’ve never heard of them being made fun of for that. Men and women wear clothes, what’s the problem with men and women liking clothes equally? And my friends boyfriend watches Project Runway but I never second guessed him for that. Maybe the problem is the people you surround yourself with?

  • AndreaNicole

    i started watching football so i could stay in the loop of conversations with my guys btwn sept-feb. i learned the game, i understand the game, and enjoy watching my Saints take boys down every week….

    That’s not to say that I would not enjoy it if my guy sat down to talk w/ me about NYFW. I love clothes…and I would truly love it if my guy was into fashion too.

    On the other hand, a lot of females still hate football and look at me like I’m crazy when I start talking about it. The same goes for guys…they don’t get how a girl can be so into the game…but whatever. There are double standards everywhere you turn. I think if you have the confidence to do “man activities” as a woman or “woman activities” as a man instead of caring what anyone else says…you’ll have more fun. Do what makes you happy.

  • UrbaneDame

    Maybe if you had a girlfriend you could have attended FNO guilt-free, stepped your closet up (not saying it’s down), and then enjoyed all the games on Sunday. #justasuggestion

  • Streetz

    LOL funny post. Not mad at this.

    You could’ve went to FNO. I passed because I was tired but I heard the ladies were out in FULL FORCE. Space and opportunity my g! hahaha!

  • Stephanie

    I often enjoy hanging out with the boys watching sports much more than the talk about diets and babies in the kitchen with the women. Don’t take that away from me!!

    What I would say is, I can more than keep up with most guys with my sports knowledge (I grew up with two brothers plus my dad) but it takes awhile to win them over. I often get quizzical looks for a few moments until they realize I actually do know what I’m talking about. I laugh it off but depending on the circumstances, it can be a little insulting.

  • Katchin05

    I feel like this would be a fine opportunity to discuss feminism & gender roles, but I won’t really do it lol. I’ll just say this:
    It’s sad that a *person* can’t do something that is of interest to them, because it doesn’t fit into what’s supposed to be okay for their gender.

  • MsBlackmanSays

    I thought about it and I could think of a few things that in a majority women tend to like more but if a man does won’t necessarily get a “side eye”… a few:

    – Spas, sometimes a man wants a massage (preferably by a cute woman)
    – Gymnastics (I know plenty of men cheering for the USA team during Olympic trials)
    – Ice skating

    Yes I know the list is short (but I’m positive there are a few more things out there)…so as a die-hard football fan, who isn’t into FNO (or fashion trends in general, or even shopping) let me enjoy this vice please… and while I love Coach Tomlin, gotta support my home team…go Gang Green!!

  • Dee

    I am a HUGE football fan. My dad used to make me watch football on sundays. He wanted another son, and I came out with the wrong internal organs. I find this post HILARIOUS! A couple of sistas I went to UG (Howard) with and a couple of brothas were both tweeting about FNO and about the football game. So maybe, you should create a post that says “Why Women and MEN who attend and tweet about FNO should not be allowed to watch football and tweet about it?” ‘Cause when I first read the title, my inner football fan said whaaaat?! 🙂

  • Kee

    I like this article, it points out the underlying issues men have with women & will have with women until the end of time. If you’re secure in your spot (sexuality) then it shouldn’t matter what you like to do! Be secure, sure of your self while doing it, whether it be a mani/pedi or whatever! The world has changed so much & so many men aren’t men it makes women question it or have doubt! I love football, not because its a whole bunch of sweaty, sexy fellas on the field chasing a ball, but because I grew up around it, playing it, and I understand it! So I say to you men out there get a mani/pedi no one likes a man with raggedy nails or toenails that’ll tear up the sheets, or her legs for that matter. Take am interest in fashion, appearances, or LMN (I’m not a fan) but its ok, just be a MAN!

  • MadScientist7

    i agree with this 100%. women who genuinely like sports or football are cool but men would have women think they are better than women who aren’t into football. then you have women who try to fake like they like football because they think that will give them cool points with that guy they like. eventually her true interests will come out and the dude will be like what happened to the girl who loved to sit in the house all day on sunday and watch nfl sunday ticket. to those women i say “get your own hobby”.

  • Madeleine

    I understand this is a blogfor straight people but the rigidity with which you consider gender roles is stunning. If a guy stepped to me at fashions night out I would read his cues to decide what he wanted from me, I would not make assumptions on his masculinity. Maybe this argument/debate is relevant in the fictional world of a black Hollywood/Tyler Perry movie but in the real world humans are complex, gender is fluid and peoples interests specific and I think most intelligent people understand that.

  • Nicole

    You know what I understand and I’ll take note. You have a point. And we as women should allow you to have your time even if we like the particular sport as well. So my man can have his Saturday and Sunday night football with his boys. And just like last night I will also be watching the game but with my girls, not on tv but at the stadium. Don’t get mad you wanted to watch it with your boys remember 🙂

  • tavia

    @Katchin05 i agree, i think this speaks to greater issues of feminism and gender roles and things being associated with males/masculinity as better, which is why a woman gets props for her forays into a generally male dominated arena, but the same isn’t always true for males.

    buti also agree with @Madeleine. i thought that this was a bit of a moot point, considering that most people of our generation understand we are complex individuals and shouldn’t be tied down to prescribed gender roles (at least i thought they did, but i can maybe that’s just a gross generalization and depends on where you are). i don’t see why a woman should get more or less points for liking whatever it is she likes and the same goes for a man. its all about being comfortable with who you are and surrounding yourself by people who are cool with that.

  • sideeye

    I chalk it up to absurd society double standards…. I love being a women that can enjoy a good fashion feista but also talk trash on Sundays and Monday nights with all the other NFL FANS…I think moe men should do what they feel and stop lettting societal expectations rule their lives….good post

  • E

    I hate to throw this cliche argument out there, and I know that this in no way shape or form is your aim in your post, however I will say this.

    Point blank period- suck it up. Women like football just as much as men, and the women whom I know who love it as much as men do- don’t love it because they want to be placed on a pedestal and adored by men because “Hey we love it too” but simply because we love the sport- now in with my cliche argument-

    Let it go and let us enjoy football. Thats ONE “manly” thing that women do- while we enjoy our fashion. Now, having sex with any man on the planet without getting a poor reputation of being a “hoe” or whatever anyones’ favorite word is, is another thing. Its not like you have to share ALL of your “manly” activities with women while we still get to be women. We, unlike you men, still face the Godawful and ever so annoying “double standard” (yes my cliche argument) but regardless, deal with the fact that you have to share your beloved football season.

  • Nephilim

    Funny @ inquiring mind. lol.

    You have some ladies that are genuinely interested in the sport, and some who pretend to be interested for the sake of seeming interested in the things her man is interested in. As for the latter, I can appreciate the effort. I do. But truth be told; I don’t care if my woman likes football or not. I like girlie girls so if she’s out getting her toes and nails done while I’m watching my JETS stomp a hole in the Ravens, I’m cool with that.

    As for the girlie things that men are excluded from doing; honestly, I’ve never heard a dude complained about not being included enough in those feminine activities. I’m always complaining that women always want us to show more of our “feminine side.” That always gets me because you’ll never hear a dude say: “baby, do you mind acting a little more manly, I’m just saying fart, belch and scratch a little more…”

  • Nicole

    I think that this is hilarious. I dont watch football unless my “friend” asks me too. When we watch together I usually just cook, run to get beer and remain fairly quiet — then last year a strange thing happened! While watching Monday Night Football ( NE vs NO) I found myself on my feet, yelling and jumping up and down. I turned around and there he sat, in stunned silence. Now I secretly watch …

  • VonBherAnn

    for real, jozen? this sounds to me like you’re feeling a tad bit insecure (no offense, really, I think you’re great). if you wanna get a manicure, get one. if you wanna shop during FNO, do it. if you feel like drinking a foofy cocktail with an umbrella in it, DO IT if it’s the stuff you like to do. there’s nobody worth your while who’s going to judge you harshly because you’re being yourself. so what if people give you the side eye. live your life on your terms, buddy.

    if you’re looking for the male version of chicks watching football, keep searching. there’s no magic “in” (and honestly, I don’t get why dudes get so pumped about chicks that watch sports. sports are not a “man” thing). just be your damn self and enjoy what you enjoy, man. chicks’ll dig it.

  • Drew

    all the men out there who enjoy baking and aren’t pastry chefs, who enjoy watching Sex and The City with a cold beer in their hands, who enjoy going to a spa and getting massaged in oils and stuff, who want to order a salad instead of a steak already have boyfriends. So they probably don’t care what women think.

  • citygirl22

    Oh, stop whining, Jozen. What’s REALLY unfair is that Fashion Week is only 1 week and football lasts a whole friggin’ season!!!!!

  • Doesn’t Matter

    It sounds like the bigger issue you’re alluding to is the fact that sexism is still alive and well. The reason women don’t really have to worry about looking masculine is because it’s not really a taboo anymore, whereas anything considered feminine is. What’s that about?

  • sideeye

    @Drew..REALLY?!!!! WOW…..what a homophobic, rigid immature, and down right ignorant view you have dude…get yourselves together..

  • Alan

    I had a very similar conversation with some of my female friends about reading men’s magazines. PERFECT POST

  • Tierra

    I love this! I actually question this all the time. Why am I forced to like men’s stuff when they refuse to partake in anything that I like? Double standards like a biatch.

  • Inner Beauty Queen

    I absolutely love this post and will be sharing it with my guy friends asap.

    I’m pleased that you don’t mind us watching football… However, if a man is secure enough to watch THE GAME (the television show) with me, then I’m fine with watching football all day long. I think it’s all about how secure an individual is regardless of what others say. Also it’s about the enjoyment they receive from the activity. If my man wants a mani/pedi (without polish, thanks!), then he better do what makes him happy. And I guess overall, I’ve had great experiences where guys and I enjoy things together, not forcing activities onto one another. Go for happiness in the end!

  • HoneyMoney

    As a joke yes we can be more flexible. But in real life..uhm, you might want to rethink that.

  • Tea

    I’m the biggest football fan in life #BEARDOWN, but I also enjoy all things girly and feminine. When I can sleep with *insert hoe number here* of dudes and not be labeled a hoe and you can sleep with *insert hoe number here* of women and NOT be labeled distinguished, then I’ll stop watching football.

    Finally, a double standard that benefits the ladies. 🙂

  • Bunny.

    you guys get to sleep around.
    we get our games && Fashion Night Out.

  • Nadia

    Jealous much? 🙂

  • Ziggy

    I can see where you’re coming from, a lot of girls would give you the side-eye for some of the thibngs you listed, however those women (and men) are just narrow-minded. I do think we’ve all been guilty of it at some point, though. That said, everyone needs to broaden their horizons a little bit. And honestly, if I saw you at FNO I wouldn’t bat a mascara’d eye, bc I saw plenty of men n not once did I think they were all gay. Men are allowed to shop or just hang out n enjoy everything the city had to offer that night; you should make it a point to go next time, single or w a girlfriend! Ditto for the salad, since when are men less manly if they eat salad i/o steak, please. And massages are heavenly, something’s wrong w you if you don’t enjoy one so, again, man or not, get to the spa 🙂

  • Ziggy

    I can see where you’re coming from, a lot of girls (and guys, actually) would give you the side-eye for some of the things you listed, however those people are just narrow-minded. I do think we’ve all been guilty of it at some point, though. That said, everyone needs to broaden their horizons a little bit. And honestly, if I saw you at FNO I wouldn’t bat a mascara’d eye, bc I saw plenty of men n not once did I think they were all gay. Men are allowed to shop or just hang out n enjoy everything the city had to offer that night; in fact, you should make it a point to go next time, single or w a girlfriend! Ditto for the salad, since when are men less manly if they eat salad i/o steak? Please. And massages are heavenly, something’s wrong w you if you don’t enjoy one so, again, man or not, get to the spa 🙂