How Crazy Became The New B-Word
I don’t know exactly when it happened, and the title of this post is somewhat misleading, because I don’t know exactly how it happened. At some point, calling a woman crazy became more insulting, more dangerous than calling her the b-word.
This revelation didn’t occur to me via the hard way. It’s not like I called a woman crazy recently, then had to use my defense skills against a kitchen knife. No. The whole, “don’t ever call a woman crazy” thing has kind of been this trending mantra I’ve picked up on within the last year or so through various conversations with women who swear they’re not crazy. Meanwhile, the way women have taken the b-word and turned into some sort of weird term of empowerment, is also something I’ve noticed.
Like I said, I really don’t know when the reversal of these words took place, but I’m going to go out on a limb and guess why.
Women have to put up with a lot of things from men. Now don’t get me wrong, men have to put up with a lot too, and I’m not trying to get into some pissing contest to figure out who has to put up with more. For the sake of this post, let’s just leave it at women have to put up with a lot of things from men. We, men, put them through the ringer, and all the while, they take our mess. They let it slide off their back and perservere as our women.
Unfortunately, all those issues a woman lets slide off her back, fall into a built up reservoir of resentment. She may not go off at an inconvenience here or a small white lie there, but she definitely remembers the slights. She stores them up like some sort of video game power up. Then her man forgets to put the toilet seat down and all of it, every negative thought she had about her man comes roaring out of her mouth towards him. What’s his response? “All because I didn’t put the seat down? You’re crazy.”
Now we should ring the alarm, because all this does is rile the woman up even more, if only because she believes crazy is something else. Crazy is impatient and going off on every single little thing she’s noticed, which she has not done. She has been patient, understanding, and above all else, calm. Crazy? CRAZY? She watches “Snapped”, those women are crazy. Can’t a woman go off on her man without being seen as delusional?
These are the things she gets frustrated about when a man calls her crazy. She knows women who are crazy, and she associates crazy behavior with emotional instability. She believes she is anything but emotionally unstable. So when her man calls her crazy, she feels he’s writing off her tirade as a delusional rant with no substance. All she’s doing is letting off her steam of frustrations. Why’s that have to be crazy?
The other problem with crazy is she never feels like crazy is her fault alone. As men, don’t ever forget, if she’s crazy, we (allegedly) made her this way (her words not mine). When she was imagining herself as a man’s woman, never did she think she’d get so fed up, she would wind up in their bed sitting on top of him pointing a gun at his face, word to Goodfellas. But now, she fantasizes about that more than she fantasizes about sitting on top of him to do something else. She’s gone crazy. She knows it, and it’s all because of him.
Crazy, I know. But it’s true.
The difference between being crazy and being the b-word? When a woman is the b-word, it’s often unprovoked. She basically woke up feeling that way, and that way she will stay until her mood changes which will never be before she feels like it. When someone else calls her the b-word, she may not like it, but she knows it may be true. A woman will apologize at times for being the b-word. She will never apologize for being crazy, unless her man apologizes for making her so.
Even a woman who know she’s crazy will warn her man she only gets that way when pushed. She’ll say, “I’m not crazy, but people can drive me crazy.” He has no idea what that means, but he still will throw caution to the wind, do his best not to bring the crazy out of her. Most men can handle a woman who’s the b-word, but handling a woman who’s coo-coo without the Cocoa Puffs? Not even he’s that crazy.
And just so we’re clear, I would still never call a woman the b-word. That’s just giving her license to go crazy.
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