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Now I Know We Won’t Run Into Each Other Again

January 11th, 2011 Leave a comment Go to comments

Last week, it was just a silly dream I had. The mere fact that I was dreaming about you was silly when one considers I haven’t seen you since the season’s have changed, twice.

As for the dream itself, well, it wasn’t very detailed. There wasn’t a lot to it at all.

In the dream, you moved, and when I woke up, I shook it out of my head. Tried to pay no attention to it, but the more I thought about how long it’s been since we last saw each other, the more I wondered if the dream was true. So I sent you a text, told you happy new year, then wrote, “Random question: Are you still in New York or did you move back home?”

Five minutes went by, you replied, and your text confirmed my dreams. You left. A little over three years after moving out here to be with me, something like two years after moving out of my apartment, you were back home; thousands of miles away from me, only a few miles away from where we met.

I sent you a text back, said we should catch up later this week, you said you would like that. So sometime this week, I’ll give you a call, but I know it’s not going to feel anything like those conversations we used to have back in the day when we were doing the long distance thing. I will have a lot to say, you will have a lot to tell me, and we’ll be able to talk like the adults we are, not about the past but about our futures independent and thousands of miles away from each other.

But one thing about the past…just one thing I want to say. As much as it hurt that we never made it past our first year of living together, and as little as we saw of each other in the months and years after our breakup, I want to just say how proud I am of you.

Whenever I tell people about us, how you moved out here to be with me, how we broke up a year later, people always ask me if you moved back home as a result. You didn’t. You stayed out here, created a life for yourself, in more ways than one. You even went and got a Master’s Degree at one of the real fancy schools they have out here. I remember near the end of our breakup when you were applying. Then even after graduation, you remained here for a short time.

For whatever reason, maybe it’s the blog, people want my take on situations similar to ours. They ask, “Should I move to this place for the person I love?” My answer is always the same, it’s the story about us, and without getting too personal the story about you.

I know we can look back and say the reason why you were ever out here to begin with was because I wanted you to be here with me and you did too. But when I think about how it’s all come full circle, and I see you’re back home now, I realize to say your move was about me is giving me way too much credit. Looking back on it all, you moved out here because it would make you happy, and I just had the good fortune of being a part of that happiness for a short time. Me and you never quite made it out here the way we planned, but it’s good to see when things changed between us, you made it out here on your own and on your own you made it back home.

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  • B

    it takes a big person to say what you just said. good job jozen!

  • TA

    Aaaaaawwww!!! I commend you for writing this post, and its nice to know that real men do exist and are able to admit the truth! I hope things work out for you guys!

  • esoteric

    “I realize to say your move was about me is giving me way too much credit.” “…you made it out here on your own and on your own you made it back home”

    It could take a whole lifetime for a person to be this mature, open and honest… Thanks for sharing!

  • MissE

    I was in this situation as the lady, and the guy was a total jerk and I was stuck in a new city all alone and depressed. It would have been nice to hear this kind of message from him. I commend you.

  • http://www.teaandsuch.blogspot.com Tea

    you moved out here because it would make you happy, and I just had the good fortune of being a part of that happiness for a short time.

    #LovesIt

  • ladybird

    Regardless of how things turn out for people, it always amazes me how some just connect allowing for the “sense” to come through. Dream or not…you knew. Connections with the right people are powerful on many levels. Nice post…..

  • ~tip.

    for the win jozen…ftw….

  • LaLaLegal

    I’ve never felt compelled to comment on “relationship” blogs until now. This is the nicest, most sincere and heartfelt thing I’ve read from a male blogger. Ever. You moved me, and I’m kind of stunned by you right now. I hope you find someone really great to settle down with one day, you have a true heart.

  • http://twitter.com/BRWNIZE Rene Hammonds

    That was VERY mature. I think that was the best take you could have on the situation, she should be honored.

  • TheELLEfiles

    This is deep. Well written sir!

  • RubyRu

    This was truly beautiful, Jozen. One of my many favourites from you.

  • Anonymous

    My favorite line!! Seriously, a slight tear…

  • barbara

    very nice jojo.

  • Chicgrl98

    I really enjoy reading your blog and continue to share it with my friends, what I admire is your ability to bring your advice and experiences and emotions to the forefront its as if you have the ability to bring the words that are placed inside you into harmonic flow for others to read. Thanks for sharing

  • Monique

    beautifully written, jozen. beautifully written.

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  • Namia20

    Looks like u guys really connected……… seems like u both still acre for each other..nice piece

  • Miss. Riss

    Very nice post. Your posts on this woman always touch my heart for some reason.

  • http://twitter.com/artrinity artrinity

    I reached this point a few months ago…When I finally was cool and looked at life where I realized I was no longer angry and indeed could see him today, hug him and say thank you…Isn’t it a beautiful place 🙂 Happy New Year to you Jozen

  • Anonymous

    Wow, this post hits home…I loved it.

  • geronimodelilah

    i feel you on this one. i was teary-eyed while reading. it’s hard to believe there’s still a man out there who could express such emotions.

    thank you for a beautiful post which brought me back to my golden days with a great man i once made a connection with.

  • http://twitter.com/caribbeanBleu Jinx Moneypenny

    Very dope, Jozen. Very.