My title
Home > guys > Quality Quantity And Why Men Are Lonely

Quality Quantity And Why Men Are Lonely

I’m beginning to hate guys, on behalf of women everywhere.

I don’t know if it’s NYC or it’s everywhere in this country, but for all the complaining we do about women and their inflated sense of self-entitlement, my job as a dating reporter for The New York Post has shown me they’re not the only ones.

If we’re talking about the odds, there’s no question, they’re in favor of guys everywhere. But just because men are playing with house money doesn’t mean they know how to play, and most guys, whether they care to admit it or not, are breaking even and it drives me crazy. Because they act like they got it, and they do have it, but they’re not doing anything with it.

My job is to set people up on blind dates. Every week a person gets to choose to go out on one date who they select from three choices I give them. Each week I have to alternate between a woman getting to choose one of three guys, and a man choosing from one of three gals. For the most part things go smoothly, but the times I have run into a problem is when I put the ball in the man’s court. The specific problem has been, the guys who do the choosing get too choosy. They develop a God complex, and everytime it happens I want to remind them of the following:

It’s just one date.
You signed up for this experience for a reason.
Closed mouths don’t get fed.
The woman might not like you, so you’re not the only one taking a risk. 

I keep telling women, men are lonely too. I know that seems hard to believe, but believe me when I say a lot of men are sitting at home, playing video games, messing around on the Internet, or some other mundane activity, all in an effort to fill up their solitude. The majority of guys will say that’s how they want it to be, just them their right or left hand, some lubricant, Internet p0rn, XBox360, and a good book, you know, for balance.

The majority of that majority is lying.

Some men don’t realize, the odds are absolutely nothing if they don’t play them. The girl he wants so bad doesn’t want him and he thinks she’s crazy when the fact is, he’s probably just as crazy for thinking that. Meanwhile, he’s ignoring a perfectly good woman, who might not be as attractive as the one that he wants, but is certainly attractive enough for him. He just has a hard time admitting that. A man can’t say he has choices when he’s not choosing. He goes to Sizzler and when he finds out they ran out of the steak entree, he’s mad, KNOWING THERE IS A PERFECTLY GOOD BUFFET AND SALAD BAR HE CAN FILL UP ON.

Most men are alone because they can’t deal with rejection. So instead of asking out the girl they really want, they’ll sit at home trying to figure out how they can make themselves look better to her. They won’t spend their time with someone else, and that’s fine. That’s how it should be. But what bothers me is how some men will never go for the girl they really want because they can’t have her immediately and therefore they act like they can’t have her at all.

I operate on this principle: I can get any girl I want….eventually.

Whether it’s in the moment or months and years down the line, a woman will wake up to a man she’s been sleeping on. He doesn’t need to do anything but be himself and be patient. He just needs to be around, not up under her, just around, existing, working on himself for his benefit. Women like that. They think it’s sexy. But don’t just believe in yourself, believe in the hype; the hype that is there are plenty of fish in the sea.

If she knows he’s at home, thinking about her, guess what? She moves onto another thought. There is no point in spending time wondering about someone when you know exactly what they’re doing. So be busy, this includes going out with other women from time to time, being open to knowing a different person. Men who only hang out with women they want to sleep with don’t end up sleeping with a lot of women. I know some men like to say quantity over quality. I agree. But I don’t practice it by outright rejecting a woman’s company. I just don’t sleep with all of my company.

Part of that is because I don’t want to, but let me keep it real here: Part of that is also because they don’t want to sleep with me. The sooner a man realizes he is not God’s gift, just because he’s a man, the sooner he will become his own man. The sooner he becomes his own man, the sooner he will learn how to get a little something I like to call quality quantity.

Quality and quantity are not mutually exclusive. It’s not about only dating fine women, it’s about knowing there’s more fine women than we think. Some men are so picky about their type, they don’t realize they sound like a woman who can’t make up her mind at a sample sale.

I have been dumped, played for the fool, told no way too many times than I care to admit. But I have also been told yes way more times than I ever thought I would back when I was a pubescent kid in desperate need of braces. And that is because I play the odds, I actually go fishing. And even if I fish for sport, I know if I want to win, I have to fish like I’m doing it for food.

The man who thinks he’s entitled to a finer woman just because there’s too many women to be with an ugly one is missing something very crucial. The fine woman he wants has way more choices than him. If she chooses to be with someone else, over me, not only am I okay with that, I’m optimistic there’s a better choice somewhere in this world. This isn’t about settling, this is about looking for ways to expand who I can settle on.

My first choice isn’t always my best choice so I put my focus elsewhere. If she’s sleeping on me, it’s not her that needs to wake up, it’s me that has to wake up and realize, I have options too and the more I get out there, the more options I have, and the more options I have, the better off I will be.


Categories: guys Tags:
  • GC

    “I operate on this principle: I can get any girl I want….eventually.” – Co Sign

  • lala

    dude, thats so sad…lol!

  • Na Na

    Ha ha ha! I don’t think its sad though. I think its cool. some men will see that you dont want to have sex right away and they bounce, when they really just exed off somebody who he could of had a lot of good times with. I say date, date, date! The good, the cute and the ugly. We’ll just leave the bad alone!

  • Xesi

    “The man who thinks he’s entitled to a finer woman just because there’s too many women to be with an ugly one is missing something very crucial.”
    ^^Correct. The “something” is this idea of (hetero) male entitlement though, not the fact that good-looking people have more options when dating.

    Your brethren have been effectively brainwashed sir & my advice is don’t save em…they don’t wanna be saved!

  • Naokinine

    First time commenting. Glad you finally addressed men’s role in relationship harmony. Yes, Men are narcissists. They get old, fat and bald way sooner. And men have less stamina. So women are also weighing our options. Are we dating for arm candy, companionship, connection or for a spiritual purpose? Keep your superficial wants/needs/requirements. I am looking for a deeper more substantive relationship. Something that keeps me inspired and teaches me to grow.

  • sandra

    – I am sandrai lives in uk and i was in a serious relationship with my ex guy for three good years.. One day we were in a dinner party, we had a little misunderstanding which lead to a Quarrel and he stood up and left me at the dinner party. i try to call him but he was not picking my calls so after than i contacted my brother and told him about it,my brother so much love me that he had to see him on my behalf,he told my brother that it is over between us.. Then i contacted a friend of mine that had this similar experience and she directed me to one of the spiritual diviner ( first i thought it was not going to be possible and i contacted him i was ask to come up with a little requirement,so i did what i was ask to do, after 3 days i was in my office when my ex guy called me and was asking me to forgive him and come back to him. i was very surprise it was like a dream to me,so ever since we have been happily married with one kid my lovely baby(Ceslav)…i wish you the best of luck…

  • Mark Sonia

    My name is Sonia, and i live in uk.I have been through hell and pain,looking for a good and real spell caster who can help me get my husband back.I have been scammed so many times,by some who claimed to be real spell casters.until i found the real and great spell caster ADAGBASPIRITUSLTEMPLE who helped me,and solved all my problems concerning my boyfriend who left me since eight months ago.and after that i also took my friend along,who was also having the same problem concerning her husband,who left her since five months ago,and the problem was also solved by the same ADAGBASPIRITUALTEMPLE”. Can’t you see! the real and great spell caster is here,all you need to do now is to contact this same address whenever you are in any problem related to spell casting.It took me a very long period of time,before i could get this real and great spell caster.So right now “” is here,and the best for you to solve your problems…….


  • Dona Smith

    i am giving this testimony cos l am happy My name is mrs. Dona Smith from Houston,taxes.i never believed in love spells or magic until i met this spell caster once. when i went to Africa in December this year on a business summit. i ment a man called dr. ADAGBA.He is powerful he could help you cast a spells to bring back my love’s gone,misbehaving lover looking for some one to love you, bring back lost money and magic money spell or spell for a good job.i’m now happy & a living testimony cos the man i had wanted to marry left me 3 weeks before our wedding and my life was upside down cos our relationship has been on for 2 years… i really loved him, but his mother was against me and he had no good paying job. so when i met this spell caster, i told him what happened and explained the situation of things to first i was undecided,skeptical and doubtful, but i just gave it a try. and in 6 days when i returned to taxes, my boyfriend (is now my husband ) he called me by himself and came to me apologizing that everything had been settled with his mom and family and he got a new job interview so we should get married..i didn’t believe it cos the spell caster only asked for my name and my boyfriends name and all i wanted him to do… well we are happily married now and we are expecting our little kid,and my husband also got a new job and our lives became much better. in case anyone needs the spell caster for some help, email address Great ADAGBAi thank you very much thank you in 1000000 times.. if not you i would have been losted and wasted thank you. please make sure you contact him for any financial difficulties okay.. What a powerful man such as Dr ADAGBA.. he is so much powerful..\ email him for any difficulties..