As you all know, a lot of my readers send me questions about damn near everything. I don’t think they send me these questions because they fancy me an expert on matters of the heart, sex, dating, or anything else. I figure they just want me to contribute my two cents to something they’ve been thinking about, then once I do, they go back to their own original take on whatever it is they asked me about.
I mean, they couldn’t possibly expect me to have a definitive answer for all of their questions, because some of them don’t really have a definitive answer. For instance, this latest question I am about to share with everyone.
I share it not because I don’t have my own thoughts, but because I think it’s topical enough where everyone can chime in down in the c-section. So here’s the question, below is my answer, and then below that, in the comments, let the person who wrote the question and myself know what you think. Remember, there is no wrong answer to this question, but there could be a funny one and we’d love to hear it.
The question goes:
Nowadays, we have options. There are all kinds of ways to stay in touch with someone, and some might even say, with so many various forms of communication at our disposal, something like a request for a phone number is slightly intrusive.
Considering at any given moment someone can hit me on my office phone, cell phone, BBM on my cell phone, Twitter, Facebook, Email, Google Talk, or AIM, I don’t mind being asked for something other than my digits. At times, I may even prefer something like my email address over my phone number. Others disagree and long for the days when one’s math was all we needed.
What it all comes down to is circumstance. When and why should I ask for one form of contact information over another form? Well, let’s break it down, shall we?
Usually, I keep this blog consistently focused on me, but today, it feels weird to go into some story or philosophy about something other than Michael Jackson.
We all have memories of Michael Jackson. I don’t know one person who doesn’t have something profound to say about the impact he made on popular music and popular culture. I don’t know one person who doesn’t remember where they were when they heard about Michael Jackson’s death. I don’t know one person who isn’t talking about either of those things today.
So considering everyone who is reading anything today will probably read one or two things about Michael Jackson, let me throw my hat in the ring.
A couple of months ago, I wrote a post entitled, “The Ultimate Compliment”. In it, I attempted to make a case for sex being the highest form of praise one person can give to another. Far as I’m concerned, if someone digs me so much they actually want to see and feel me without any clothes on, than they must really, really dig me. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the simple comment about my topwear (“Nice hat”) but will she take me home in the hat? No? Then she only means it so much, but I digress…
I realize my hypothesis above is a bit of a stretch. Sometimes sex isn’t a compliment at all, but maybe an act of obligation or even an act of redemption. Each encounter must be evaluated (if we want to bother with such things) in context because sex is a lot of things. But I know what it isn’t. Sex, as far as I’m concerned, is never disrespectful. Nor is my desire to want to have sex with a woman disrespectful.
When you called me a few weeks ago to tell me you were having a baby, I have to admit, my heart plunged straight into my stomach and I felt every inch of its downward spiral. I believed you from the moment you told me. There wasn’t a shadow of doubt this was real, the news you were sharing with me, and though “Congratulations” weren’t the first words out of my mouth, you were patient with my stutters.
We then talked for an hour about everything that had to do with my new life and your new life. You even playfully suggested I was going to write about the phone call on this blog, but I didn’t. And now, while the details of our conversation still aren’t for public consumption, I will say this: Thank you for that phone call back in May.
If it wasn’t for your foresight to share the news you were expecting, who knows what would’ve happened when I saw you on Saturday?
Well folks, it’s official, I am now an uncle to a beautiful niece. Her name is Armoni (pronounced like the fashion label), and she came into this world on June 11, at something like 7 pounds, 21 inches.
My sister’s in great shape post-delivery, the father has stayed at the hospital with her every night, and our family couldn’t be happier. I know I couldn’t be happier. With Armoni in my family, my whole life has now changed for the better and now it’s time for Uncle Jozen to do everything he can for his only niece, but just as important, for his only sister too.
No “Poppin’ The Questions” today. I have decided to only go with it once a week, and I’ll pick a day at random, so look out for it sometime next week.
In it’s place, I would like to continue my ongoing, sporadic series called “Stupid Arguments.” These posts are centered around exactly what the title suggests, the stupid arguments I’ve had in relationships and how they have spun out of control.
To be clear, I really do believe every argument is valid because even when they seem so trivial, they probably have some deep seeded issue tied to them. But still, how we get to the real issues is often times the long way there, and usually comes from a place so silly and trivial, we almost can’t believe how it started. Here are two examples, courtesy of Lord of The Rings.
Just so we’re clear, at no point do I claim to be an expert about anything that doesn’t concern my own life. I have not let any of the questions I get go to my head, and at no point would I tell a person to take what I say as absolute or law. But since some of you all ask, I enjoy answering and so begins another round of “Poppin’ The Questions”. I promise you, I don’t make these questions up, only the answers.
Thanks for all the questions, folks! Keep them coming, as I’m going to continue to do this every Monday or Friday until the The Million Dollar Matchmaker event goes down on June 3 (buy your tickets through here and enter the code “bachelor” for your discount).
Remember what this is about. Just giving you all a better idea of who I am, prompted by your questions. I appreciate all of you supporting me in the comments with last week’s installment. I’ll continue to do this twice a week, then once the event is done, probably go to once a week, every Friday. Tomorrow, I’ll give you all the regular posts for those who still aren’t feeling the “Questions” installments. Now, here we go, Poppin’ The Questions 3.
So my first installment of “Poppin’ The Questions” garnered what is I believe my lowest comment total ever. Normally, I would take that as a sign to not continue, but I’m going to continue this ongoing series of answering Formspring questions. Not only is it a time saver (the reader’s questions practically write half the post), but because I think it’s important to answer the small percentage of my readers who take the time to ask me a question.
Before we get into the latest installment, a quick reminder:
For all those in New York City on June 3rd, come check me out along with other esteemed relationship writers as we discuss matters of the heart at The Modern Day Matchmaker event. Look to the right of this post, tickets are $20 if you buy them through this site.
Now, time for the questions.