I showed up at his door drunk, in heels, a trench coat, and underneath, a brand new piece of lingerie I bought. And can you believe this fool wanted to just talk? — true story from a female friend.
Dude, she had on some lingerie, but I told her she didn’t need all that, just get naked. — true story from another friend
I bought a new lingerie set, and you had the nerve to tell me you were too tired. — true story that happened to me in college
Fellas, enough is enough. The women are out there talking bad about us, putting less effort than ever in their nightwear and it’s our fault. We have no one else to blame but ourselves, because we have found some way to disrespect the lingerie.
For as long as I have been alive, men have used the 1-10 rating scale to rate women. Is it right? Absolutely not. Is it fun? Hell yes.
But here’s the real question, is it honest? Every man I know will say his woman is nothing under an eight. Maybe he will be man enough to admit she’s a seven, but those guys are few and far between. And anything below a seven isn’t even worth discussing unless the man is mean spirited enough to call her out for being below a seven.
What men need is a new rating system. Too many women are being called 10’s to the point where the whole idea of a 10 isn’t even sufficient enough to describe true 10’s. Now we’re calling them 11’s and 12’s. Huh? If the system was so perfect, there would be no need to go above it. Well, one night, in the midst of a random conversation with my boys about girls (duh), we stumbled upon a new, much better system. I’m using it, my boys are using it, and now I’m sharing it for everyone else to use. And yes, ladies, you can use it too if you so please.
There is an unfortunate stigma attached to women and seemingly not attached to men. That stigma is vulnerability and it’s unfortunate because it’s one-sided.
A woman can’t be alone with a man she barely knows. She can’t accept a drink from a man she just met. Hell, sometimes, she shouldn’t even be giving her phone number to a man she just met. Email might be best.
These are all unwritten rules when it comes to socializing, and a big reason why they’re in place is because a violation of any of these rules can possibly leave a woman vulnerable to some unfortunate consequence. And trust me, I get it. All of these rules I just mentioned above are for the well-being of women, and I would encourage all women to follow them. Sure I may be baffled at times when a woman with whom I vibe says she can’t go home with me, but I certainly understand her declining on the grounds of personal safety.
But today I want to talk about when a woman accepts my invitation or sometimes gets up the gumption to invite me without even knowing so much as my last name. Of course, she’s vulnerable to me, but hey, what about me? Aren’t I vulnerable too?
Us guys, we’re a peculiar group. Sometimes, I find the things my brethren and I do to be confusing, nonsensical, and frankly, idiotic. No shots at any one particular, no jabs at one group of men over another group of men. I am not without fault when it comes to masculine stupidity, and I feel I have demonstrated this numerous times on my blog.
What I probably haven’t shown is the ways guys are idiots to each other. I love my boys, and I know my boys love me, but every once in a while we have to call each other out on the dumb stuff we do.
So begins an ongoing series in which I share boneheaded and unnecessary dumb things men say and do towards one another. Think of these as loose outlines to a Judd Apatow movie script. I will not break down why guys do these things, or why I do these things, I will just put them out there as discussion fodder, and if you don’t understand, don’t look for me to explain. It’s a guy thing.
I usually don’t like to use my posts to tell men what to do and not to do, because let’s face it, I’m just like most men. I’m no better or worse. I just have a voice through the words I write, and I always try to speak up for them by putting myself front and center.
But there is something I feel the need to talk to men about today, and though I fully understand whatever a man chooses to do is his business, there are some things I must speak out against. Not because they affect me in a direct way, but some things my brethren and I do are just stupid and someone needs to step up and say, “You know what? This is stupid. I’m not doing this anymore and you shouldn’t either.”
To emphasize how stupid I feel this particular issue really is, every now and then I’m going to break into all caps a la Kanye West. ::ahem::