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A Check-Up on the Words ‘I Love You’

October 8th, 2013 10 comments

We were sitting across from one another having brunch. The waitress came with our first order, a large salad we decided to share. With no hesitation, I dove my fork and spoon into the large bowl of arugula, gave it a couple of light tosses, and then pushed together a nice-sized portion. “Give me your plate,” I said. She picked it up and I laid down the serving and then another. “Is that good?” I asked. “Yeah,” she said. As I began to serve myself, she said, “I love you.”

That was the last time I remember hearing those words and feeling them.

It wasn’t the first time she said it. The two of us had been together for a while and said it to each other pretty regularly. But for whatever reason, at that moment, those words, the way she said them, were crystal.

I recalled that moment recently, after I watched this video of a guy who proposed to his girlfriend and planned her wedding using her Pinterest board as a guide. It was one of those viral videos I first ignored on Facebook, and only watched after enough of my friends asked me if I checked it out. The entire thing is pretty touching, assuming you have a heart, but the one part that stuck out for me is when Ryan, the guy who proposes, said that up until the moment he asked Amanda, his girlfriend, to marry him, he never told her he loved her.

As one of my boys said, Ryan must be a magician because to go five years without ever saying “I love you” is pure magic. I laughed because it’s true.

After I saw the video, I thought for a long while about Ryan’s reasoning behind never telling Amanda “I love you.” In the video he says, “I didn’t want to use that phrase until I felt like I could back it up with every fiber of my being.”

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